With Ben In Between
by arkmj
Summary: She was in love with his brother, he was everything his brother hated. She has been the object of his dreams, she is haunted by her first love.
1. Max

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

Leaning her head against the cool window, Max stared out as it poured down on Seattle. The dreary night was doing nothing for her mood, nor was this foo-foo party she was attending with Logan. He owed her major for this night. He begged and pleaded for her to be his date so he could interview some high fluent someone for a major article he was working on. Frankly she could've cared less, but she relented. But ever since they arrived, he was driving her insane with his posh attitude, and lack of attention paid to her.

Looking around the room, Max looked for someone who was at less than 20 years her senior, but no such luck. _'Why do I get myself into these things?'_ She thought miserably as she headed towards concessions, or the "ordure" table, in hopes of finding food she could recognize. While she was over there she heard some women giggling like schoolgirls. "I wish I was 10 years younger, I'd sweep him up as my own." One lady swooned.

"I know what you mean. We never had a stud like that when we were young, makes me jealous of any lucky lady who might capture his heart." Another giggled.

"All I k now is, if I can't have him for myself, I want him for my daughter." A third replied with a drunken giggle. Max just shook her head slightly and examined the so-called food in front of her. "Oh my god, there he is! He just walked in, single!" Max heard her exclaim, which followed the others to giggle excitedly. Whoever this guy was, she hoped he knew he had cackling ladies reaching the stalker level.

Seeing nothing appeasing, Max turned around to see who was this mystery stud was, but saw no one that could be put in that category. Looking for Logan, she saw him in a, seemingly, deep conversation with a guy who tried to grab her ass earlier in the evening. _'Again, why do I get myself into these things?'_ She asked herself.

Feeling hot, she weaved her way through the crowd to go and sit on the balcony. As she started to walk out, a beautiful melody began to play from the band that she hadn't really noticed before. _'Ben,'_ was her first thought when realizing it had been Ben's favorite classical piece. With that realization she felt waves of emotion threaten to become a tidal wave. But before that could happen, "Would you like to dance?" A deep voice came from the shadows, whirling around Max felt the breath leave her body and heart stop.


	2. Alec

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

Another stuffy party to attend, another crowd of too rich people to suck up too. This was not his idea of serving in the military or spending his one night off. But still, duty called. With one final tug at his bowtie, Alec followed his father and commanding officer into the overly crowded room. Immediately the host and hostess of the party greeted him. One of the militaries biggest backers when it came to funding, the Shipman's where filthy rich and bored, "Mademoiselle," he bowed to the hostess, making her blush and giggle as if she were a little schoolgirl. Standing straight, he followed his father further into the party.

After doing the customary rounds of meet and greet, Alec needed something strong to drink. Slowly making his way to the drink table he stopped dead in his tracks. It was her, from the pictures. Standing there looking bored, but as beautiful as ever. The photographs hadn't done her justice, at all. Remembering to breath he watched her make her way to the open balcony, away from crowd. Stealthily, he made his way to follow her. He was entranced, and that never happened to him.

What brought him out of his thoughts was the band beginning to play an all to familiar piece of classical music. He knew this by heart, and in his heart he held in his emotions that were connected to this music. Taking a deep breath he walked out onto the balcony, why he didn't know.

"Would you like to dance?" He asked, not realizing himself. He must've surprised her because she turned around quickly, but faltered just quickly. She knew who he was, or maybe she thought she knew who he was. He wasn't sure. She didn't more or say anything for a few faltering moments.


	3. Safe

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

It seemed like decades before Alec received a response, if her actions could be considered a response. She didn't say anything, just slightly dipped her head, looking him straight in the eyes. Taking her small hands into his own, he began to waltz around the balcony.

It was a dream, a fairytale, a scene from a cheesy movie; she was dancing with her prince. At that thought, reality set in, he wasn't her prince; he was her prince's twin brother. Two separate people, and very different people. Once she came back to reality she started to analyze the man in front of her. He looked just like Ben, exactly, but there was a difference. Eyes. Same color and specks, and held locked secrets, but Alec's held something more. Something she never saw in Ben's eyes.

Alec watched her, she didn't say anything, and he wanted her too. He had been wanting to meet her ever since he saw those pictures all those months ago, and still to this night he didn't know why. She was just some girl that was photographed by his brother, but something haunted him. He watched her take him in; did she know who he was?

­­­­­

Neither of them talked that night, after that one dance, separate people interrupted them. Logan, collecting his date, and his father collecting his son to socialize, still nothing was said.

"Man you need to get over it, you're gonna make yourself go insane." Biggs told his best friend. Alec just sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. He knew Biggs was right, but for some reason he couldn't. "You aren't going to find her, you don't know her name. You have a picture that you found at your brother's place. She was prolly just some girl that did a model spread for him and went on her merry way."

"Cale."

"What?"

"Cale, Logan Cale, that reported fuck, he came and told her it was time to leave that night. He was her date, fuck! She's his girlfriend that he's always bragging about!" Covering his face with both hands, Alec felt like the world's biggest chump. Of course she had a boyfriend, anyone who looked at her would be shocked if she didn't. "I'm so stupid."

"Sometimes I do wonder," Biggs muttered under his breath. Alec just glared at his best friend and threw a piece of wadded paper at him. Biggs just ducked and didn't get hit. "And you're Manticore's finest? You can't even hit me with a lousy piece of paper wad? Tisk, tisk, your slipping." Alec just shook his head and smiled, "Tell ya what. We're in town, lets check out Crash."

"Crash? Is that another Sci-fi based bar where the waitresses are aliens and the drinks look like someone took a green shit?" Biggs just laughed thinking about when they were in Roswell.

"No it's a bar, and quite popular. I'm sure we could find a few hotties to get with while we're here. Maybe they'll show us the town or something else." Biggs just wagged his tongue while smiling.

"Why am I friend's with you again?" Alec asked jokingly.

"I'm the only poor fuck who will deal with your constant mid-mid-mid life crisis'." Biggs responded like it was the most obvious thing the world.

"Really? I thought it was because I took pity on your poor ass." Alec threw back as he got up to leave the table.

"Nope, other way around." Biggs tossed at his retreating back. "Meet ya at 10!" His only response was Alec's middle finger over his shoulder.

"Boo you need a whole night of some heavy ass drinking." Original Cindy looked at her sulking boo lying in her bed. "What happened that night?" Max had come home after the little party with Logan and hadn't been the same since.

"I saw him."

"Him? Him who?"

"Alec."

"Who's Alec? Oh. Ben's Alec?" It clicked.

"Yeah, it was like looking at ghost dressed in military. We danced together, to 'his' song." Max mumbled while playing with her pillow. Cindy walked over to the bed and hugged Max.

"You need to let him go before he takes you with him." Cindy made Max look at her, "What happened was a terrible, terrible accident. Accident! Meaning no one's fault. No one knew that the ice would turn black, and no one knew that he would get out to try and help those people. No one knew! Boo, you have to realize that no matter what you would've done that night, Ben was still going to pull off to the side to help those people, because that was who Ben was." Max didn't say anything. "Now that you've seen Alec, what do you feel?"

"I don't know. At first I felt like a princess dancing with her prince, but then I realized it wasn't Ben."

"What did you feel with Alec?"

"Safe."


	4. Crash

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

"Boo, you are gonna get your scrawny, depressin' ass out of this apartment and go for a night on the town with yours truly. You got 1 hour to make your self presentable enough be in the presence of Original Cindy." Cindy stated pulling the covers off the hurdling form on the bed. When Max looked at her, she raised her eyebrow, crossed her arms, and stuck her hip out to make her point very clear. There was no room for if, and or but. When Max saw this, and knew exactly what her roommates body language meant. Letting out a disgruntled sigh, Max climbed out of her bed and headed to her bathroom to start getting ready. Seeing this, Cindy was satisfied and went to get ready herself.

At 9:50, Biggs arrived at Alec's apartment, and just walked right in. since they had grown up together, neither ever learned to knock on each other's rooms or apartment doors, unless there were questionable sounds coming from the opposite side. Thinking of 'that one time' Biggs shuddered as he closed the door. Seeing the bed room door closed, he figured the military prodigy was still getting ready. Deciding to start drinking early, he went to the small kitchenette and grab a beer. On the small island counter were the infamous pictures that had caused his best friend to become a love sick puppy. Picking one picture he stared at the girl. He had to admit, she was hot and sexy, and wouldn't mind getting to know her. He could understand Alec's 'obsession', as he nicknamed it, with the girl, but he wished he's wake up from the funk he seemed to be in. 'Thanks a lot Benny boy,' he thought to himself.

"You ready?" Alec questioned walking out of the bedroom. Seeing his best friend looking at the pictures, he rolled his eyes, "Let's go."

"Been obsessing again," Biggs joked taking one last swig of his beer.

"Fuck off," Alec muttered grabbing his helmet and leather jacket, "Come-on lets go." The two friends walked down the stairs to their motorcycles and took off and neck-breaking speed.

"Here we are," Biggs pointed to the underground bar. Alec came to a stop next to him and looked at the place. It was an old building, with lots of people coming in and out. "Come-on we'll park in back." The two sped around the building parked.

"So what's so great about this place again?" Alec asked looking at the people coming in and out of the place.

"Good booze, music, and hotties. All a guy needs to forget an obsession." Biggs smiled and patted Alec on the shoulder when Alec gave him a death glare.

"You're a ass-hole."

"Thanks for noticing."

"I'm buying first pitcher, maybe you'll loosen up." Cindy declared after they found a table by the pool tables where many of their friends hung out. "You don't go trying to disappear," and insure that wouldn't happen, Cindy plucked Max's precious Ninja keys from her hand, "Now we leave on my terms." Max just glared at her friend.

"Hey O.C., hey Max!" Sketchy greeted coming up the stairs to meet the two. "You guys wanna play a round of pool?"

"Max'll play ya," O.C. offered walking off to the bar to get a pitcher to start the night out with.

"Not bad, Biggs," Alec commented as they walked down the stairs. The place was booming with music and vibrating a good size crowd of people around their age. In the distance he could see pool tables set up. "We'll have to play some rounds," he added pointing to the tables. Biggs smiled and nodded.

"Come-on lets get a bottle and pitcher and find a table." Slinking their way to the bar, the two were finally able to get a bottle of scotch and pitcher of beer, and then headed to find an empty table. Back towards the pool tables there was a single table opened, moving quickly the two moved to the table and watched the pool game going on. Some guy named Sketchy, seemed to be losing and no one was surprised.

"Hey I'm got a call coming in," Alec told Biggs as he headed out of the building. Biggs turned back to the game and watched a girl come up to the table and start playing against the guy Sketchy. 'She looks familiar,' he thought looking at her profile, but couldn't place her.

"You break or me?" She asked the guy smiling, and then it clicked. 'Dream girl!' Went off in his head, he didn't recognize her without the short blonde hair that she sported in the pictures. Damn, she was hotter in person. His attention got turned to another girl who approached the guy and girl playing. She was as hot as dream girl.

"Boo's, pitcher!" Cindy announced to Sketchy and Max when seeing Max taking her final shots. Out of the corner of her eye she saw some guy almost analyzing Max and Sketchy. Either he had the hots for her boo or he batted for the other team. And the way he was looking, he had the hots for Max. "Hey Boo come here." When Max reached her she pulled her into the seat next to her, "Ya see that dog over there? He's trying to read you like a book." Max looked over and saw the guy, who had turned away. He looked familiar, but she didn't think she had seen him around here before.

"Cindy, that's Alec's bestfriend, Ben told me about him!" She whispered when it her, and at that moment Alec walked up to the guy in question and was talking, oblivious to Max being a table down from him. "Cindy!"

"Boo I think the fates are tellin' ya somethin'," Cindy smiled at the paniced look at Max had, "Boo maybe this is your chance to let go and say goodbye to Ben, and maybe say hello to someone else." Just as she said that Alec looked up and saw the back of Max's head, and Cindy. He didn't didn't know Cindy and didn't know that Max was right there. Cindy just smirked a little and took a sip of her beer. This night was going to be interesting.


	5. Abandoned for Manticore

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

"I'm telling you man, that's here with the long hair," Biggs said in a low voice to Alec, "And you didn't tell me she wasn't blond!" Alec chuckled at that. "You always go for blondes!" Alec didn't pay attention to the last part because he finally got a glimpse of the mystery girl, it was her. Suddenly he didn't know what to do. "Go talk to her, she's alone." Indeed she was, her friend was gone and she sat at the table staring at her hands. Taking a large gulp of scotch and a deep breath he walked over to his future, hopefully.

"Hi," Max's head shot up at the sound of his voice.

"Hi."

"We never got around to introducing ourselves the other night." Alec looked at her, she seemed nervous, or shocked; he wasn't sure, he knew he was nervous. "I'm Alec."

"Max." Silence.

"So do you enjoy going to those parties?"

"Uh, not really. It was a favor to a friend. I would rather sit around and drink beer than some hoitie toitie champaign." Alec laughed.

"I can agree to that." The ice was broken, and from there they talked. As the night wore on, Alec learned little things about Max, but as he learned the more entranced he became with her. Maybe Biggs was right, she was his obsession. It wasn't until he and Sketchy were playing a game of pool that Max suddenly bolted. She looked as if she had seen a ghost. Before any of her friends could react, he was racing after her.

"Hey!" Max turned around quickly, still looking as if she had seen a ghost, and in a way she had

FLASH BACK

'_Man, you're gonna win again!' Sketchy groaned seeing that Alec was indeed going to do so, for the 5__th__ time. Before taking his final shot he looked up at Max and saw her watching him. When he looked away, she ran._

_Max watched as the games came and went and each game she felt as if she was seeing a ghost. It wasn't until Alec looked at her with that cocky, winning look that her breath left her body and felt Ben was in front her once again. He had given her that look several times when they had gone to local bars and pubs to hang out with friends back in New York. The only reaction she could muster was run. And that's exactly what she did._

"You ok?" Alec asked catching up to her.

"Yeah, just got stuffy in there, you know." Max replied weakly. Alec stood in front of her and pushed his hands into pant pockets.

"Wanna take a walk?"

"What?"

"Take a walk. You know you walk, maybe talk, possibly freeze our asses off, but in the end we aren't stuffy and we get some well needed exercise after drinking all that alcohol." Max couldn't help but laugh at this. One difference; Alec was a smart-ass, Ben was serious. Something, almost tiny as a dust speck, melted away from her heart. What was that feeling? Nodding, the two began to walk down the street in silence.

That night was incredible, if someone were to ask Alec later on. He got to spend a total and hour and half with his dream girl and actually got to know her. By the end of the night he worked the guts to meet up with her sometime and hang out.

If someone were to ask Max about that night, she would say the same but in a different light. "So Boo, where did you and pretty boy disappear to?" Cindy asked as Max got ready to got o bed. Max avoided looking at her room-mate, which spoke volumes. "Boo," her tone told Max that it was time to talk.

"I went for a walk with Alec."

"With Ben's identical twin."

"Yeah."

"Boo, did you go for a walk with Alec Ben's twin, or did you go with Alec, the guy you met for the second time?" This confused Max.

"What?"

"Did you go for a walk with Alec, Ben's twin, or did you go with a walk with Alec, the guy met for the second time?" She repeated.

"What's the difference, they are one in the same."

"Wrong answer." Max continued to look confused, "Those are two different people right now. Alec, Ben's twin, is the ghost of Christmas past for you, Alec, the guy you just met, is the ghost of Christmas future."

"What are you talking about Cindy?"

"Did you talk and spend time with Alec because of Ben? Or did you because you were truly interested? Can you answer that?"

"Because I wanted to."

"That doesn't answer the question."

"I wanted to, I was interested."

"In comparing the brothers, the past and present," Cindy shook her head. "You spent time with Alec because you want Ben. Right?" Max looked away, "You spent the entire night comparing the two, thinking of Ben, not Alec." Max continued to look away. "That's wrong Boo, he is a human being who has feelings."

"No he isn't! He abandoned Ben for Manticore Military!" Max snapped viciously.

"Says who? Ben? Ben's word is law I guess." Max's face turned into a cold stone, "You can glare at me all you want Boo, but at least at the end of the day I'll be able to deal with myself."

"What's that suppose to mean?!"

"You want to replace Ben's death with his alive twin, who probably doesn't even know you knew his brother, or the fact you were almost his sister-in-law! You want this vengeance on Alec, vengeance for whatever he may have done to Ben. It's all about Ben. You want Ben, and Alec is pretty much his clone."

"So what if I do, what's wrong with that?"

"What wrong with that is Alec isn't Ben, Ben died almost a year ago in tragic accident. Alec is here, alive, and obviously infatuated with you, not your dead twin."

"I don't have a twin." Max muttered.

"That's besides the point. What you are doing is wrong and eventually it's going to burn you badly. I'm sad to see that you would sink this low, Boo." With that Cindy turned and walked out of Max's room.


	6. Coaxing Kiss

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

In weeks after that night at Crash, Alec and Max got to know each other. Alec falling for Max more and more, while Max continued to convince her self that Alec was the enemy, but at the same time believe that Alec was Ben. Cindy never mentioned a word that she said that night to Max either, but Max knew what she thought, but never addressed it.

As time continued to pass, Max began to also see that Alec was very much a different person than Ben. Alec was an outgoing, goofy rogue with a love for adventure. Ben on the other hand had been a quiet, serious writer with a love for photography. That had what made Max fall for Ben in the beginning, like her, he liked to be alone at times and didn't always need to be around other people. It had been the first time she had met someone like that. The stories that he would write would make her fall harder for him. It wasn't until they had been dating for almost a year that he told her about his family

Flash Back

"_Ben, why don't you ever talk about your family?" Max asked as she finished preparing their dinner. Ben sat on the counter next her munching on some carrots._

"_Not much to tell," he shrugged his shoulders finishing the carrot. Leaving the stove she stood in front of him and leaned into him. Ben wrapped his arms around her waist and looked her with a little smile._

"_Come-on there has to be something there," Max coaxed lightly kissing him. She felt Ben smile, he knew her game and he couldn't resist it._

"_I'll tell you a story later." Satisfied she pecked him on the mouth once more before moving back to finish their food. Ben just smiled, only shed could do that to him._

_Sure enough, later that night when they were laying in their bed, Ben told her about his family._

"_My dad and mom were the militaries strongest and brightest, and children the strongest and the brightest. Dad was considered the military prodigy before he was 18, mom was the top weapon designer. They had my twin Alec and me, and we were raised in the military world."_

"_What branch?" Max asked burrowing her head further into his shoulder, enjoying the feeling of him wrap his arm around her shoulder more._

"_Manticore. It's the best of the best put together to create better or the best. My grandparents were part of the starting of it. It's separate from the Army and Marines and such. But they collaborate when times call for it. Growing up Alec and I were being raised to join the forces, be the next of generation. I didn't want to, I preferred everything but the military.."_

"_And Alec?"_

"_Aside that differences, we were always close. Alec? He was born and bred for it. Best of class, the fastest, and the charmer for the bored rich who need to put their money somewhere they can brag about." Ben just stared at their bedroom wall as he explained his family history to her while Max watched his facial expressions. "When I decided to leave the military base, my parents irate. They tried to convince me I was wrong, Alec didn't say anything. When I left, he didn't do anything then either." Max hugged him, feeling the betrayal radiating off him._

"_I'm sorry," she whispered after a few moments of silence. She felt Ben lean down and kiss the top of her head and linger there for a few moments._

"_You didn't do anything but put up with me," he whispered to her. Looking up, to him, Max felt her heart swell when she saw he was looking at her with that look that was reserved for just her._

Max felt a tear make it's way down her cheek, she missed those moments. Those moments when they would lay in bed or on the couch and just be in each others company. Taking in a deep breath Max willed the rest of the tears that threatened to fall, to disappear. Ben wouldn't want her crying. Letting out all those emotions, she stood up and finished getting ready to meet Alec at Crash.

Thinking about the difference of the two, she felt something in her heart melt again, tiny but it was noticeable. It was the feeling again, Max furrowed her brow, what was that.


	7. Relief

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

It had been 3 months since they had officially started dating. It had been 3 months since Max, without realizing it, started to let Ben go. Alec slowly took down her barriers and she found herself falling for him, but still pinning for Ben at the same time. He was always in her thoughts, even when she should be thinking about nothing but Alec. Things were complicated. To top it off, Cindy always gave her that look, the look that spoke everything she had said that first night. But Cindy never said anything to Alec about Ben, nor did Max. But Cindy did say one thing to Max one night after Max talked about the fun with Alec, "But Boo, no matter Ben is in between you two, always." Since she had said that, Max had pondered over the statement.

"Hey you," brought Max out of her thoughts. Looking up she was greeted with dancing hazel eyes that belonged to Be-Alec. Alec.

"Hey yourself," she responded smiling. Alec leaned down and captured her lips in a kiss that made her toes curl. He could kiss, that was for damn sure. When he pulled away, "I think I want another." Smiling he leaned down and kissed her again. "That's better, so how was your day?" Looking at Alec, Max noticed he was in his Manticore fatigues.

"Long, tiring and boring. I think my dad is catching on that there is a girl who is stealing my concentration." He smirked walking into his kitchen and grabbing an apple. "What bout you? Anything interesting"

At that moment a flashback hit her.

_Ben leaned against the island in the kitchen of their loft, he was wearing baggy sweat pants and old paint splattered t-shirt and started chomping into an apple. He looked hot. "So you wanna model for me?" He asked not quite sure he was understanding what she was saying._

"_Why not? Think of it as just a little thing for you and me to do," Max answered walking up to him with her head cocked._

"_Why do you want to do this?"_

"_Because I want to see you working, on me," she responded saucily. Ben raised an eyebrow. God he was so sexy when he would do that. Standing in front of him she looked up to stare in his eyes, "Plus I'd rather you take my picture than some chick you found on the street who had a nice rack."_

"_I found you on the street." He said referring to when they had first met. They had ran into each other outside his apartment. She was drenched and couldn't find a hotel. He knew the feeling and offered for her to come up to his apartment to get dried off. From there became friends during the torrential down pour, and by the end they decided to meet up again. From there they moved in together, and here they were now, still together and in love. "And I think you have a great rack." He muttered._

_A week later she put on a blond wig and a little pair of white undies and posed for him, and just him._

"Max? Max?" Snapping out of her reverie, two things happened. First, she saw Alec looking at her confused. "Where did you disappear to?" And the second she felt something melt away.

"Uh, no where just thinking that you need a shower because you stink, and then you need to make me something to eat and watch a movie of my choosing."

"All about you is it?" He asked smiling.

"Why of course didn't you hear? I'm the queen bitch and you are at my beck and call." She responded walking up to him and wrapping her arms around his neck, "Of course if you don't want to, I'll go call on Biggs." She was referring to when Biggs had told her if she was ever tired of the dumb ass, Alec, to come call him. Walking away she crocked her finger to make him follow.

"You wouldn't dare!" He exclaimed, when she just smiled he rushed after her and threw her over his shoulder. "Let's see if you can even walk to Biggs!" With that they disappeared into his bedroom, for several hours.

Hours later, laying in Alec's comfortable bed, Max had her head on his shoulder she relaxed as he lightly ran his fingers up and down her arm, while his other played with her fingers. It had been their first time together and Max was a whirl wind of emotions. Flashes kept flashing in her mind.

"_Maxie…I think I love you," Ben whispered into her ear. They had just made love for the first time, he was laying on top of her, wrapped securely in her arms._

"_Ben you think there will be a day we don't want each other anymore?"_

"_No, never."_

"_Ben you ok?"_

"_Manticore destroyed my life, you gave me a life. I…uh…Maxie…marry me?"_

"_Do you ever think about trying to talk to Alec again?"_

"_Alec is Manticore! Manticore is everything I hate! I want nothing to do with them!"_

Each those moments with Ben, moments she shared with only him. Closing her eyes, pieces of her heart melted away, but it didn't hurt or scare her. She felt…relief.


	8. Cheese

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

_Damn rain, she hated rain. Where is the damn hotel? Why wasn't this big adventure working out to be an adventure? Max heaved her duffel over her shoulders again and trekked through he curtain of rain to find her hotel for the millionth time. Looking down at her directions, she didn't see the person stopping in front of a door to unlock. What had made her realize that was when she ran into something warm, dry and solid and landed in a cold we puddle on the hard ground. Looking up she met with the most amazing hazel eyes; they were mesmerizing. "Are you ok?" His voice was like silk, smooth._

"_Uh, yeah sorry," she grumbled trying to stand up. Seeing that she was soaked the guy ushered her over to his door. "What are you doing?"_

"_You're soaked, come up to my apartment and dry off. When the rain dries up I'll take you to yours."_

"_I don't have an apartment, I'm new here and trying to find my apartment." Max muttered hating the feeling of wet._

"_Well then I'll show the right way there, until you need to get dry."_

"_Are you some weirdo?"_

"_Well I am weird, but not the kind you're talking about. I'm Ben." Holding out his hand Ben smiled slightly that made Max want to melt into him._

"_Max, nice you to meet you." The two shook hands and Ben lead the way to his apartment, or loft more like. It was one big room, with screens set up to cut off a space. Windows lined an entire wall, and the ceiling was nothing but windows. It was amazing. "This place is amazing!" She let out taking in the place; Ben chuckled and disappeared behind a set of blinds._

"_Here's some boxers and a t-shirt, the bathroom is behind you to the left. I'll make you something hot to drink." Taking the dry clothes, Max never felt much better once she was changed. It felt great to be dry. "So where are you from?" _

"_Seattle, and you'd think I wouldn't mind the rain." Max joked sitting on a bar stool in front of the large island in the kitchen part. Ben was on the opposite side getting ready to boil water._

"_You would think, but I guess we all have a quirks in the world," he joked smiling. For the first time Max was able to really look at him. He was gorgeous, sexy pouty lips, endless pools for eyes, and dark blond hair. Under his leather jacket he looked like he was broad shoulders, trim waist and likely to be around 6 ft or taller. He was dressed in a black shirt and jean, which clung to him from being extremely soaked._

"_Where are you from?"_

"_Around, here and there. My family moved around a lot when I was younger. When the water boils make yourself a mug of tea or coco. I'm gonna go change." Nodding, Max watched as he walked away, stripping his leather jacket off. Oh god, the shirt was a second skin and showed everything was to see, on the top half. _

_When she had her hot chocolate, Max wandered around the immediate vicinity of loft. In the TV area there was a big plush couch with a matching single seat and a table in front of the two. A TV sat on a small stand in the corner facing the seats, behind the couch was a table the length of the couch. Pictures framed in simple black frames were set haphazardly. Pictures of people, animals, buildings and objects, all beautifully photographed._

_A few feet away from the couch there was a large desk flush to the wall of windows. A single lamp sat on the 2ft ledge, hanging over the desk. Looking down at the desk where random pieces of paper with writing scribbled on them. Realizing what she was doing, Max cursed her self and headed back to the island. Just as she sat down Ben showed up again wearing black sweats and a matching t-shirt._

Waking up, Max felt as if something was missing. Looking to her side she saw Alec was gone, but a note was on his pillow. **Had to go to work, didn't want to wake you up. I know this note is cheesy but I did say I liked cheese! **heart **A**


	9. GoodBye

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

Author's Note: I've had a lot of questions about this story and I thought I'd clear up the confusion. Manitcore is a military branch that is relitively new to exsistence. It is the best of the best in science and military and works with the rest of military branches. Transgenics are sci-fi - this fic is set in an alternate universe. If anyone has any questions just ask!

* * *

With Ben In Between

One year.

One year. One year and Max felt like a different person. Alec was very much a part of her life. No he was her life. Over the months he grew on her and slowly Ben stopped appearing for her. It was as if for the first time, he had left her. For good. But while he had left her, he was still very much in between her and Alec, and Alec didn't know it.

Weeks earlier

_They were sitting in a comfortable silence, eating take out and drinking beer. "Why don' you ever talk about your family?" Max asked Alec suddenly, the suddenness showed in his shocked face._

"_That's random."_

"_I know. Well?"_

"_I don't know, you never asked before."_

"_Well I am now, come on."_

"_Ok, family was born and raised military. I had a twin brother, Ben, he past awy a few years ago." Oh god. _

"_How did he…?"_

"_Car accident. Someone was in a ditch and he was trying to help them, a passing car hit black ice and hit him. He died instantly." She knew this already, she had read the report from cover to cover, thousands of times. She had told her self the tale of events millions of times._

"_I'm sorry."_

"_Not as much as me." He whispered looking at his Chinese food._

"_What?"_

"_The last years of his life Ben and I never talked. It was partly my fault." Alec had an expression on his face that shocked Max. Remorseful and pain._

"_Why not?"_

"_I don't want to talk about it, can we change the subject?"_

After that conversation something in the back of Max's mind was itching. What it was, was to tell Alec about Ben, her Ben. But she never could muster the courage. "Cindy?" Max called out into the apartment, it was technically still her apartment, but she pretty much lived at Alec's lately.

"What's up Boo?" Cindy walked out of her bedroom dressed in her weekend clothes, relaxing and laying around the apartment type of clothes.

"Got a minute?"

"What's up?"

"I think I'm in love Alec." Cindy just stared at Max for a moment before sighing. "And I think I need to tell Alec about Ben…and me." Cindy didn't say anything, she just walked up to Max pulled her into a firm hug which Max reciprocated just as firm. "And I'm scared that if I do I'll lose him, but if I don't I'll lose him still." It wasn't until Cindy pulled away and wiped her face did Max know she was crying. She seemed to be doing that a lot lately.

"Boo, you are in love with pretty boy or you wouldn't be worrying about this." Cindy answered as she pulled Max towards the couch.

The two sat there and talked for the next couple of hours, and would've kept talking if Max's phone hadn't rang. "Hello?"

"Hey you." It was Alec, he was happy, and that made her happy.

"Hey, what's up?"

"I was thinking I'd finally make you a real dinner, no take out. How about a nice dinner, some good beer and maybe go for a movie."

"Sounds great, I'll meet you at your apartment in a few, k?"

"Great, see ya soon Maxie!" He hung up,.

"_Goodbye Maxie," Ben's voice said over the receiver._

"He said good bye." Max whispered to Cindy.

"What?"

"Ben, he said goodbye that night when I talked to him. He said goodbye, I just remembered." Cindy stared at Max confused.

"Ben's finally left me, and I feel free. And I'm not sad." Max looked at Cindy with happiness shown on her face. Cindy smiled and hugged Max once again.

"You need to go see that pretty boy of yours." Max nodded and left to go to Alec's apartment.


	10. Wait and Time

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

When Max walked into Alec's apartment she was shocked at what she was greeted with. Low light, dozens of candles and Alec nowhere to be seen. Walking further into the door, Max saw the island with fancy white linen hanging over the edges, on top was a table setting for two. Smiling she shed her jacket and closed the door. "Like what you see?" Alec's voice came from behind her, looking over her shoulder she saw Alec standing in the bathroom door dressed in simple jeans and long black shirt. Turning to face him completely she let him see her smile. "I'll take that smile as a yes," he answered himself with a smile.

"What's the special occasion? Got some special girl coming over?"

"Yep, and you wouldn't believe how special she is, and how crazy I am about her." Max smiled a little wider as he said that. Simple sentences made her smile and feel this massive flutter in side her. "And the special occasion is that a year ago today this amazing girl decided to give me a time of day and decide let hang around her."

"Sounds like you pretty crazy about her," Max whispered.

"You have no idea," pushing off the door jam he walked slowly to her, "She doesn't really like saying this, but I'm so crazy about her I'm in love with her." The flutter was everywhere in her body.

"I love you too," she said looking into his eyes. She didn't say it often to him because she hadn't fully let go of Ben. When Alec noticed she didn't say it often, out of respect, he didn't say too much to her. So when she did say it, he fell in love with her all over again. Smiling he looked down at her and leaned to give her a kiss.

"Want some chicken?" He asked, no kiss. Max's eyes opened wide after she had closed them anticipating a kiss. When he asked about chicken instead she reached around and smacked him on the outside the head, lightly. This time he did kiss her, good.

Ben could wait another day, right now it was just going to be her and Alec, the guy she fell in love with.

The next morning, Max woke up with a beautiful, white tiger lily on the pillow with a note. **Move and you won't get food.** Laughing she snuggled back under the warm blankets and waited for Alec to appear with the said food. Sure enough moments late her walked in with two McDonald bags on a tray with a fake rose in a chipped drinking glass. "Wow, swept me off my feet last night, and today…"

"I went cheap and quick!" Alec finished handing her a bag and taking his own.

"Great follow up." Max commented taking a bite out of her egg sandwich. Alec just grinned, literally, a cheesy grin. Man leaned over and kissed him and then continued on with her breakfast. The two laid in bed and ate and talked ever so often. "So when you got to go to work?" Max knew it was one of his days in the office, as much as she hated to admit. She liked him warm and next to her in bed.

"Never."

"What?"

"I called in sick, though I doubt anyway believes me." Alec shrugged his shoulder smiling, "I decided I'd be too tired after last night and wanted to relax all day today." Max sat up, leaning on her shoulder and looked at him, she felt like she was most important person in the world at that moment. He, the perfect solider, was playing hookie. "What?"

"I love you." Alec's face broke out in a wide grin before he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her.

"So if I play hookie you'll love me? That's not very supportive of my choice in work," Alec teased. Max just laughed and smacked him on the head again.

"You're a dork sometimes."

"You love me anyways!"

Two weeks since their anniversary dinner, one week since he bought the item in his hand. Sitting at his desk at headquarters he stared at the item. It was almost as perfect as she was, and he couldn't wait to give it to her. "You alive?" Looking up Biggs stood in his door way.

"Hey," Alec greeted putting Max's gift back in its box and in the drawer he had been sitting for the past week.

"When ya gonna give it to her? Personally I'm going to think you're going to give it to me because every time I come here to see ya you're holding the thing out. Sorry Alec you aren't my type," Biggs fluttered his eyes at his best friend, Alec just through the nearest pen at the clown. "Violence is not the answer!" Another pen.

"Then why are you in the military dumb-fuck," Alec laughed, "So what do you want and make it quick. I don't like looking at your face anymore than necessary."

"This just came from the heads," handing a thick folder over Alec knew immediately what it was.

"Transfer." Biggs nodded slightly while he sat in the chair in front of the desk. This would put a huge damper in his plans.

"What are you going to do?" Alec just shook his head and shrugged, he knew he had an obligation to Manticore, but at the same time there was Max.

"I don't know, what do you do? Once you signed in ink, you signed in blood according to Manticore." Alec felt torn.

"Better figure out soon, Uncle Sammy and Monty Cora want answers, soon."

"You aren't ever going to let me live that down are you?" Alec asked. Monty Cora, his drunken nickname for Manticore that he had made up when he and Biggs were in basic training.

"Don't know what you're talking about," Biggs said leaving.

Max sat in her room at her apartment that she shared with Cindy and stared at the box in front of her. She hadn't opened it since she first filled it up back in New York; she hadn't looked at the contents since before she got the call about Ben. But now she needed to, to let go of Ben for good.

Opening the box a wave of memories flashed in her mind as she saw different things. Pictures, nick knack gifts she and Ben had given each other, books, and other miscellaneous items. The first thing she picked up was a frame with a picture of her and Ben. A friend of theirs, who was a photographer, had taken the picture. They were both bundled up with big fate scarves around their necks and fighting the wind. Max's short curls were flying into Ben's face as the photo was snapped, both were laughing and looking at each other. Max waited for the tears to come, and then didn't. The next item was gold pendent with the Virgin Mary on it. Ben had given it to her as a birthday gift, even though he knew she didn't share his favor for religion. 'To protect you,' he had told her simply. She had worn it on occasion, but her job in New York didn't allow jewelry so it often remained in the box it still resided in. Cocking her head slightly she remembered how Ben had a matching one and it had been like a security blanket for him. When he was thinking hard or nervous, he would finger the pendent and seem to ease. It was funny she had never noticed that before.

An hour later, the box was empty and there were piles on her bed. Piles of things to go to charity, burn, and keep for memories. Grabbing an old shoebox, she placed the mementos to keep inside and closed the box. Grabbing the tape, she taped it closed. There really wasn't any reason to open it, not anymore. The rest of things she did as she saw fit with. And at the end of the night she didn't cry or feel the urge to. She didn't feel something melt inside her either. Instead she just felt loved, from Alec and Alec alone. Smiling to herself she grabbed her jacket, it was time.


	11. Ben

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

That night Alec sat down with a beer and began to sift through the folder contents. Another mission, in another country and permanent residence in another country, far, far from Seattle, and Max. Taking a swig of beer Alec sat and thought about his options, and then he began to think how his dad would react if he 'passed up' his mission. It would be hell all over again, the type of hell that had happened when Ben made it clear that he didn't want to be Manticore. "No don't go there," he scolded himself. Living in the past only made things worse. He had come to terms with that stuff a long time ago.

Alec came out of his thoughts when he heard a key jiggle in the lock of his door, and heard Max mutter some profanity. A smile formed from his scowl, she always hated the lock on his door. 'It didn't like her' as she would claim after failed attempts to open it. After only a few seconds, record time, she got the door opened and was greeted with a grinning Alec.

"Alec I need to tell you something." Max stated slowly. Alec furrowed his brow, and his grin faded, slightly; her voice gave way that there was something wrong. That scared him, putting his report down on the island; he turned this stool to look at the woman standing in front of him. She still had the ability to take his breath away.

"What's wrong Maxie?" He asked taking her hands into his, when she took them out, he started to feel panic rise into his chest.

"I need to tell you something," Max, repeated, as if trying to will her self to say the following sentence, "It's about when we met."

"Huh?" That wasn't quite what he was expecting.

"I knew you, I knew who you were." Alec looked confused.

"Um, ok…"

"A few years ago I moved to New York and met Ben." Suddenly everything was making sense.

"Maxie, I know." Max blinked a couple times, now she was confused.

"What?"

"I know you knew Ben," Alec responded rubbing his neck. A habit he had when he knew things were going to get confusing or uneasy. "After Ben died, I went to clean out his apartment and when I did found his portfolio full of photographs and portraits that he did. In there were pictures he took of you." Max felt breath leave her body; he didn't know everything.

"Alec," she started.

"Max, it's fine. So you knew my brother, I don't care." Standing up he made a step towards her, which she responded with a step back. "Max?"

"Alec…I didn't just know Ben." Alec stared at her, that panic feeling rising up again, "I dated Ben while I was in New York; I was in love with him." Everything shattered.


	12. One Question

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

Author's Note: Just wanted to say 'Thanks' for all the reviews I've been receiving on this story. Thanks so much!

With Ben In Between

* * *

"You what?" Alec whispered. Max felt tears brim her eyes, this painful, but the look on Alec's face was killing her.

"I lived with Ben in New York, we were in love. I was visiting Cindy, here, that weekend of the car accident. By time I got back, I heard you were in town to take care of his stuff. So I got all my stuff out and left the building and came back here and moved in with Cindy."

Alec stayed very quiet and still, Max fidgeted nervously and anxiously. She wanted him to do something.

"Ok," he said as if still trying to take everything in. "One question."

"What?"

"When we first met and started to date, were you dating me or Ben?" A simple question that needed a simple answer; if only it were that easy. She could lie and say that it was he and only he, or tell the truth and possibly lose him forever. Max felt a tear fall down her cheek, and that was his answer. Alec knew the answer, and it felt like a knife into his gut and heart.

"I-"

"I have my answer, I think you should leave." He cut her off abruptly standing up and walking to the front door, holding it open he refused to look at her. Thick tears fell quickly down Max's face at those words and his actions. Either way, she had lost. As if walking to her death she walked slowly to the door, but stopped in front of Alec. Leaning up she placed a light kiss on cheek and walked out.

She couldn't hold the sobs anymore; they racked her body and became harsher with each one. When Alec closed, slammed, his door, she fell to the ground and sat on the steps and just let all her emotions out. She didn't care if the other residents in building called the cops or complained, she couldn't move.

It wasn't until Cindy called her cell and came and picked Max up, that Max was able to move. Cindy didn't say anything, just held her as they walked to their apartment. To Cindy, Max was like a lifeless doll just doing as she was suppose to. It was Cindy who undressed Max and dressed her in her bedclothes and got her to her bed, and it was Cindy who walked back to Alec's.


	13. Cindy

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

Alec had drowned himself a ¼ down a bottle of scotch when someone was banging on his door. Not even drunk, just pissed angry, he answered it by ripping the door open. The last person he expected to see stood there, Cindy. She wasn't fuming, like he would expect her to be, she just stood there waiting to walk in. "Cindy?"

"Pretty boy," she reciprocated. Alec moved to the side and she walked past him. "You probably think I'm here to put a smack-down on your ass."

"Why would you think I would think that." He snarked back.

"Don't give me attitude, Alec," she had his attention, she never called him by his name. Slightly taken a back, he blinked, "I'm here to see if you're alright." That was very unexpected.

"What? I break up with your best friend and you want to know if I'm ok? Am I drunk?"

"No you ain't drunk, and yes I'm here to see if you're alright because I know why you broke up." Well wasn't this night just full of surprises.

"You knew?"

"Yeah, I knew. I knew about Ben when Ben was alive and Max was with him. I knew you were his twin when she told me."

"So I'm the big joke for you all. Come here to gloat and laugh at how stupid I was to think I could fall in love with her?"

"No. I know you're hurt, Boo." Alec sat on a stool and stared at his hands, he was shattered. "I didn't agree with what she did and I'm not here to condone it either. I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

"Why did she do it?" Alec was still looking at his hands, his voice like a little boy's. "Why did she play me like that? Why did she let me fall in love with her if she was only going to rip my heart out of my chest?"

"Because she was scared and… sigh I don't know Boo. I do know that she was confused at first, but she didn't play you. She fell for you." Alec snorted at that, "none of that," she reprimanded. "She does care about you Alec, she's told me so many times and it scares her. When she realized she was in love with you, she told me that she had let go of Ben for good. But she was afraid to tell you about the two of them because she was afraid this would happen. But on the other hand she would feel guilty if she didn't." Alec never looked up. "Don't hate her, and don't beat yourself up because you fell for her.."

"No matter what, I live in his shadow, no matter what." Alec whispered, Cindy blinked not understanding that statement.

"What?"

"Ben, no matter what he wins and I remain in his shadow."

"You're gonna have to explain because I have no idea what you're talkin' bout." And Alec did, and suddenly Cindy understood a lot of what he was feeling and saying.

"Don't tell Max. She doesn't need to know." Alec requested when he had finished. Cindy could see nothing would be gained, only lost, if she did.

"I won't," Cindy promised. Alec had never looked up from his hands, until Cindy made him face her. Tears were brimmed in his eyes, and Cindy felt for him. Two hearts were broken in one night, and only those two who held them could fix them. Pulling Alec into a hug Cindy felt him respond immediately. He reminded Cindy of a child grasping for some love, and in a way that was exactly what he was.

"Thanks." Alec said as he walked Cindy to his door. When she decided she had her answers, she said she would take her leave. Giving him one last hug, Cindy walked out the door. After he quietly closed the door, Alec made a call and went to prepare for the reason of that call.

When the call was made, things were now set in motion. Taking in everything that had happened that night, Alec grabbed his scotch bottle and grabbed a box buried in a closet. Tonight was a night to let out the past... and get extremely, numbingly wasted


	14. Left Base

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

For weeks following that night, Max tried to call Alec, but he never answered or returned her calls. She couldn't visit him at work because you needed a pass to enter on base, and she didn't have one. She felt lost and more lone than she had ever felt in her life. Cindy has been good to her, keeping her from making a complete fool of herself, and hadn't given her a speech along the lines of 'I told you so.' That was a comfort.

"Get up Boo," Cindy instructed stripping the bed of the bedding that was currently cocooning Max in oblivion warmth. "Get up, get presentable and let's go."

"What?"

"You have a delivery to the base in exactly 30 minutes. You have 10 to get presentable and get you butt on that bike." Cindy stated handing her a package that was clearly marked 'Manticore Military Base.' Not believing her luck, Max jumped out of her bed and grabbed the first clean pair of pants and shirt. In 5 minutes, amazingly, Max was out the apartment door and on her bike, off to the base.

"Jam Pony Messenger," she announced to the gate guard. Checking her badge and the package it self, he nodded and opened the gate. Max felt breath get shorter for her as she peddled her way to the main base. "Breathe Max, breath in and out." She coached her self as she got closer. "Hi, I'm looking for Major Swanson's office, I have a package for him." She informed the receptionist at the main door.

"Down the hall, take a right, and walk straight down. You'll come to another desk, they'll buzz you in and just walk to the end of the hall. Major Swanson's office is at the end." Nodding her thanks, Max made her trek to the office. Sure enough, she followed the directions, and delivered the package and never saw Alec. _'Got my hopes up to much,' _she thought sadly re-tracing her steps to the front.

"Biggs?" She called out as two men walked pass her. The one in question turned around at his name and saw her standing in the hall.

"Max what are you doing here?" He didn't remember Alec getting her a pass to the base.

"I had to deliver a package to someone, I'm on my way out."

"Oh, that's good," this was awkward.

"Um, is Alec here? I need to talk to him." Biggs looked at her for a second before he turned to his companion and whispered something. For a second she thought Biggs was just going to leave her standing in the hall, but she saw his companion continue walking and Biggs motioned for her to follow him. A few doors down they walked into an office that had his name on the door.

"Max, Alec isn't here."

"Oh, well um…can you tell him to come see me or talk to me sometime. I need-"

"No Max, Alec isn't here, at Manticore anymore." Max blinked, clearly confused, "Three weeks ago he shipped to Manticore's base in Europe. He's going to be there for an indefinite amount of time." Max couldn't breath, he was gone and she couldn't tell him everything she needed to. He left her.

"Oh," she said weakly, swallowing a sob that was threatening to explode. Biggs felt bad for her.

"I'm sorry, I thought he had told you before-"

"Before I messed up?" She joked weakly, tears were starting to brim, "Well sorry for bothering you, I better leave." Turning to leave Max had to swallow another sob.

"Max, are you ok?" Biggs felt like something was wrong, beyond Alec leaving and breaking up with Max, he had a feeling that there was something more.

"Uh, I don't know, Biggs. I…needed to tell him something important, but I can't so…that's that." She croaked swallowing hard and fidgeting.

"Is there anything I can relay next time I talk to him?" He was grasping for straws but he felt for her, even if she subsequently betrayed his best friend.

"I don't think you want to relay what I have to tell him, so no there isn't anything you can relay to him. Don't even mention you saw or talked to me. I gotta go." Walking out the door, Max pulled her cap down over her eyes to hide the tears that were getting heavy with each step.

Biggs sat behind his desk and thought about his encounter with Max. He was torn on what to do. He saw what finding out that Alec had left did to Max, the light went out in her eyes. Part of him wanted to immediately call Alec and tell him about seeing Max, but the solider in him questioned her, she had lied and betrayed his best friend. He should right her off. Sighing he leaned forward and rested his face in his hands, even dead, Ben managed to continue to fuck Alec's life up. "Thank you Benny," he whispered into his hands while thinking at the same time, _'Thank you fucker!'_

* * *

Once Max was off the base, the tears fell and the sobs wretched through her. She was alone; he had left her and left the country. A few miles away from the base, she had to pull over and just sit, on the ground, and sob. Any hope of her talking to Alec had died when Biggs told her he had left, "indefinitely".

Swallowing her last sob, she stood up and took a deep breath. It was time to let go of Alec and get on with her life. She had to prepare for her future that was not too far away. Taking a shakier breath she closed her eyes.

"_You're a fighter, Maxie, you'll survive no matter is thrown at you." _ Ben's voice floated through her head, he had told her that once when they had first met.

"_I think I love you for…hmm…you're…ability to take on any and every thing." _Alec's followed; he had said that the night of their anniversary when they were just relaxing together. Hearing his voice in her mind made her stomach flutter, lungs lose air, and heart clench.

* * *

After that day at the base, Max had become some completely different. She worked harder than she ever had, and became focused on how to make ends meet for when she would have the baby. Everyone around her saw the drastic change, but no one addressed it. Few knew about the break-up between her and Alec, and only one person knew everything about the break-up. Cindy had never pushed her to reveal what had happened at the base that, even though she knew something had happened. Something that had made her friend a shell of the person she was.

"Boo?" Cindy whispered into her friends bedroom where one sole candle was lit.

"Yeah," Max's voice floated through the air. Hearing a rustle of sheets and blankets, Cindy could make out Max's body turning to face her.

"What happened?" Though simple and some what vague, Max knew exactly what Cindy was asking and referring to. When Max didn't say anything for a few moments, Cindy walked into the dark room and laid beside her room mate and friend. It was then that Cindy saw a silent trail of tears making their way down Max's cheeks. "Oh Boo," pulling the Max into her arms she rocked her slowly.

"I saw Biggs at the base," Max whispered, "Alec left Manticore and moved to the European base for "an indefinite amount of time." He's been gone for three weeks," the last part came out in an anguished voice that tore at Cindy's heart. "And now I'm all alone because I screwed up. I should have listened to you that night, I should have told him from the beginning, but I--I just wanted Ben so badly that I would settle for anything!" Max sobbed.

"Shh, Boo...I know," Cindy soothed.

"Oh god it hurts, Cindy. It hurts to think about him, think about how I hurt him. I can't breath sometimes, I can't think, all I want is to go back and tell him in the beginning and hope that he ends up loving me. Not leaving me all alone."

"Boo, look at me," reluctantly Max did, "you messed up, yes and all you can do is go forward; with or without Ben or Alec, you have to. You have a baby growing inside of you that needs you be strong. I know you hurt, I know, but you can't become this shell. It won't make the pain go away, it'll make it dormit for awhile and then you'll hurt too much." Max made a motion to speak, "listen to me Boo. You need to cry it all out now and then get up and go on with life. Alec hurt you, and you hurt yourself when you hurt him. You're gonna have to live with that, no matter what, and that might even mean living with out Alec all together," whipping away a trail of tears Cindy stared at her best friend straight in the eye, "but you'll learn to live with it. Maybe some day down the road you won't hurt," whipping more tears away, "but right now what is important is you pull yourself together, now."


	15. No

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

Alec sat against the wall of his new apartment as he listened to his messages, of his old phone. Leaning his head against the wall, closing his eyes, he listened to her voice. Some she was composed, the rest she was crying or sobbing. She wanted him to call her. Then there is the message from before that "night". Her laughing or just returning his calls from before, his heart kept clenching. He missed her.

Finally going to his new messages there was messages from friends and co-workers, but nothing about her. Swallowing a lump, he turned his phone off and stared at it. Looking around his apartment he just saw boxes that needed to be unpacked, but he didn't care. Standing up, he looked at the huge window that stared out to the city below; it was a beautiful scene. "Max would love this," he said to him self somberly. Max would like a lot of things here, the front door doesn't stick, the apartment is bigger than his last, he had a new couch that didn't slump in the middle, but he had the same bed. When he accepted the transfer he had requested that he be able to take his bed One thing that wasn't new, one thing that she liked before and would still like now, if only.

buzz, buzz, buzz buzz, buzz, buzz Looking at his phone he saw it vibrating around the floor, 'Biggs' showed on the screen. "Hello," he answered.

"How's Europe?" Biggs voice blasted through the earpiece.

"It's…Europe, not much to say." Alec sighed sitting on the window seal.

"You sound like shit."

"Thank you captain obvious."

"What's up?"

"I miss her. I miss her, I love her, and I hate her at the same time. Is that possible?"

"Apparently so because you're feeling it right now." Silence fell between the two.

"Have you seen her?" Alec's voice reminded his friend of a small boy who was scared. Should he tell him what had transpired earlier today? Biggs didn't know.

"Uh, yeah I saw her this morning. She delivered a package to the base." Alec immediately sat up straight.

"What did she say? Did she ask about me? How'd she look? Is she ok?" He asked if a hurry.

"Whoa, one question at a time. We ran into each other in the hall and talked for a few minutes. She said she had been trying to get a hold of you. Man you didn't tell her you were leaving?" Biggs asked suddenly, Alec immediately slumped, "That's low." He knew it too.

"She didn't tell me about Ben," he fought back, weakly. Biggs just sighed.

"She didn't know you had left, when she found out she left pretty soon afterward."

"How'd she look?"

"Like how you sound. Look I'm not going to relay every second of that few minute meeting. You miss her and love her like you say, call her! She's been calling you for weeks, before and after you left. I just wanted to call and see how you were, I'll catch ya later, ok?"

"Yeah, later," back to staring at his phone, Alec fought the temptation of the voice in the back of his mind and his heart to call her. As he was about to do such, one thing came to front of his mind, Ben. Instead of calling, he threw the phone, hard, across the apartment. "No."

* * *

How long Alec sat there, he didn't know. He couldn't think straight or really think at all. His lack of ability to think was very likely contributed to the large amount of scotch flowing through his system like a second bloodline. Ever since that night he had been drinking a lot more than would be considered "occasionally" or "socialably". Numb. That was what he felt, and he loved it. This way he didn't feel the stinging pain of betrayal or the love that still made his heart pound harder with each passing moment of thinking of her. Taking a large, last gulp of scotch Alec through the empty bottle at the opposite wall where boxes still resided. He was aiming for one in particular but because of his numb state, he didn't hit it exactly. But the shards of broken glass did and that satisfied him.

That "special" box that he had aimed for was a simple white cardboard box that was labeled in large magic marker letters, tauntingly, 'Ben.' It was all of his brother's things he had kept from when he had cleaned out his loft in New York, in there was everything he had left as a connection to his seemingly a stranger of a brother.

The night he and Max broken up he had tried to go through the box but he later decided he wasn't drunk enough and didn't have enough alcohol in stock to survive the trip down a lane he wasn't familiar with. Before he had re-closed the box he had tossed in some things, things that should be with his dearly departed brother's possessions. Things that had a connection to Max, after all she loved him, him being Ben. Why not join them in solitude of a cardboard box that will be stuffed away in a closet for eternity. Ok, maybe not eternity, but at least until he decided to get drunk and be self-pitying. And at the rate he was going, the box would probably just stay where it was for a while.

Banging his head against the wall behind him, Alec closed his eyes. All he wanted was Max.


	16. The Message

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

"Alec you here?" Alec heard a familiar English voice rang out. Walking out of his bedroom he saw Vanessa in the kitchen un-loading groceries. "There you are love, where do ya want this junk you call food?" Smiling he took the junk food she held out, as if the vilest thing on earth, and placed it in the cabinet next to his head. "Ah, you special cabinet of vile food, I'll never understand you Americans."

"Ah, 'Nessa, you love me anyways!" He laughed kissing her on the cheek. She just swatted him away as she continued putting food away. "So how was your day today?"

"Good, the café got busy at lunch, so only had my ars grabbed under 10 times!" She said in a fake cheery voice. "What bout you Mr. Military?"

"Same ol', same ol'." Alec shrugged his shoulders as he sat on the counter and watched her move around the kitchen. He had met Vanessa a few weeks after moving to Europe. She opposite of everything he had left behind; tall, blonde, electric green eyes, and thin like a model.

"Oh Biggs called this afternoon, when I popped in. He left a message on the answering machine," she commented leaning down in the refrigerator. Alec didn't do anything at first, since he was busy admiring her backside, "if you are staring at my ars I'll slap the bloody smirk off your Yankee face!" She threatened, not even looking up. Damn, she was good.

Laughing he walked over to his answering machine and waited for Biggs message to come on, but first he had to listen from messages from his mother, friends and colleagues. _'Alec, hey it's Biggs… sigh you need to come back to Seattle, it's Max…she's (unable to make out). Dude, you need to come back, fast. Later'_ Alec stared at the machine. What was wrong with Max? Biggs sounded serious, and that worried him. Vanessa had heard the message and walked over to Alec.

"Alec?"

"I gotta go to Seattle soon," he said briskly walking past her to his bedroom. Vanessa wrapped her arms around herself feeling the brush off in more than one ways.


	17. Rub the Tummy

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

"Here Boo, water," Cindy said handing Max a bottled water while placing a pitcher of beer on the table. Max smiled a thank you and took a drink.

"Man I can't wait to drink again, water doesn't cut it after a long day with Normal," Max groaned as Sketchy and Cindy took sips of beer and she just made a face at the offensive bottled water. Both friends just laughed.

"Man Max, I still can't believe you're gonna be a mommy!" Sketchy said rubbing her protruding tummy lightly. The moment would usually be sweet, but with Sketchy already slightly tipsy, so now it was just comical.

"Fool, stop drooling over the mama to be," Cindy pulled Sketchy away from Max's tummy and plopped him down on the stool next to her. "Go play pool, maybe rubbing Max's tummy will give you good luck!" Sketchy took it seriously and took off to see if it were true. Cindy and Max cracked up laughing, "So how ya doing Boo?" Cindy asked sitting next to her best friend.

"I'm good, but tired."

"How's Logan?"

"Good, he's going to come get me from here in a little bit and take me to the apartment. His cousin is going let me borrow her son's old crib."

"Boo you sure this is a good idea?" Cindy looked serious at her friend.

"What else can I do Cindy? Make us go broke trying to stay a float? Logan has offered to help out with the extra costs that are going to come with the baby. I've set it up that I'm going to pay him back, every cent. But when I have the baby, I'm going to need the money. We both are, I won't be able to work for the last few weeks of pregnancy and after the baby is born." Cindy sighed and took her friends hand, she knew Max was right but she hated the other part of the story.

"What's you decision Logan wise?" Max knew what she meant.

"You mean him wanting to raise the baby as his own? No, the closest he'll be is uncle." Max looked down at her stomach and ran her hand over the bump. "I think a part of me is wanting Alec to come back and sweep me off my feet and want the baby." Smiling sadly she looked at Cindy, "But I learned a few months ago I can't think that way. Logan's a good guy, but he can't be the father." Cindy felt herself release a breath she didn't realize she was holding. When Logan had posed the idea to Max, Cindy hadn't liked the idea. Not that she had something against Logan, she just didn't think it was right for him to try and be the father of someone else's child. Plus, like Max, Cindy was hoping Alec would come back and forgive Max.

"Max?" Looking past Cindy's shoulder, Max saw Biggs standing with a girl looking shocked.

"Hey Biggs," Max smiled as he walked towards her and Cindy.

"Hey Biggs, how are ya?" Cindy smiled as she greeted the young man, she had always liked him.

"Good, how are you guys?" He asked, slightly staring at Max's stomach. Seeing his reaction, Cindy started talking to his companion.

"I'm good," Max responded smiling and motioned for him to sit down. He did but continued to stare at her stomach, suddenly that day at the base made since. Something important that she needed to Alec, oh shit.

"How far along are you?"

"A little over 5 months. The baby is due in December." Just as she said that Logan appeared out of nowhere.

"Hey Max you ready to go?" He asked, not acknowledging Biggs. He didn't care much for the military types.

"Yeah, uh, Logan this is Biggs, Biggs, Logan," Max introduced, noticing Logan's brush off of the man sitting with her. Logan gave a curt nod, and tight smile, which Biggs just nodded to. He had never liked Cale. "Can you wait a few minutes?" Logan took a second to finally catch the hint, and left…after kissing Max on the cheek.

"So you guys together?" Biggs asked tightly.

"No, he'd like to be, but no." Max felt uncomfortable, "he's helping me out with the pregnancy and going to with the baby. Since I won't be able to work for awhile, he's going to help out so Cindy and I aren't on the streets with a baby."

"Max if I had known I would've helped," Biggs offered.

"I know, and I didn't want you too. The reason you'd help was because it's Alec's baby, and Alec isn't here…by choice."

"Is Logan going to be the father?"

"No, he wants to be, but it's not a title that I can pass around." Biggs stared at her with an unreadable expression, "I guess a part of me is hoping he'll come walking through the door and forgive me, but then I come back to reality." Standing up, Max held out her hand, "It was nice seeing you Biggs." Nodding he took her hand and pulled her into a hug which she reciprocated. "I better go," and she walked away. Biggs sat there and watched Max weave her way to the front of Crash where Logan waited for her. He watched as Max walked up the stairs and Logan followed, out on the street and out of sight. He hated the sight; Logan shouldn't be a part of that scene. Alec should.

Biggs sat there for a few and thought about what Max had said and decided it was time. Pulling out his cell he called Alec's apartment, hoping to catch him home for lunch, no such luck. "Alec, hey it's Biggs… sigh you need to come back to Seattle, it's Max…she's," a loud ruckus started up around him, "sick. Dude, you need to come back, fast. Later." Blinking he couldn't believe he just said that Max was sick. "He's going to kill me," he told him self smiling, "that is if he doesn't thank me first."

"Max leave?" Cindy's voice broke Biggs's thought.

"Yeah, Loggie boy came and got her," Biggs said standing up, "I can't stand the man." Cindy smiled, she had heard Alec and Biggs talk about their dislike for the journalist who ran the column 'Eyes Only: Last Free Voice.' "Was she going to tell him?" Biggs asked staring at his phone, Cindy stood in front of him with a sad smile on her face.

"Yeah she was, after they had talked out everything Ben wise, but when he wouldn't talk to her, she never got the chance." Cindy answered truthfully, "she felt that she needed to tell him about Ben before the baby, she didn't want him thinking she was trying to trap him to her." Biggs nodded and looked at Cindy, smiling he walked back to his date.

* * *

It had been a week since Alec had got that fateful message on his machine, and hadn't talked to Biggs at all. He had tried, millions of times, but Biggs never answered, which only increased his frantic. When he was finally on a plane headed for Seattle he began thinking about Max more than he had in awhile. With Vanessa, he was able to distract himself with someone who was a polar opposite of Max in looks and attitude. Resting his head back on the headrest he thought about his last conversation with Vanessa, it had been an ultimatum; her or Max. When he had said he needed to see if she was ok, Vanessa tried to leave.

* * *

"_Vanessa!" Alec stopped her from moving from her spot._

"_Why are you stringing me along? If you want to run back to her, then fine but don't drag me along!" Vanessa demanded, "I don't get it. She hurts you and the moment she's sick you go running to her?"_

"_Yes she hurt me, but if she is sick or something has a happened bad enough that Biggs would call me then I need to see her."_

"_Why?"_

"_Because…"_

"_You love her."_

"_No…because even though she hurt me she was also my friend, and someone important to my brother. The hurt she caused doesn't erase that, 'Nessa please don't do this."_

"_No Alec, please don't do this, to us. We're good together!" She wasn't crying, she just held the face of anger._

"_I have to, Vanessa, please see that."_

"_What I see is you running back to your ex-girlfriend the moment she has a cough or whatever the hell is wrong with her, and ignoring your current girlfriend!" Closing her eyes, Vanessa took a deep breath and released, "It's me or her Alec; you can't have both. You leave, I won't be here waiting for you; it'll be over."_

"'_Nessa…"_

"_No Alec, I deserve to be the one and only girl, not the girl who's the only one when the ex isn't in the picture! Me or her, your choice!" Alec stared at the woman in front of him. When he didn't say anything Vanessa pursed her lips and nodded, "I have my answer, I'm going to go." Suddenly Alec was reliving that night when Max told him about Ben. And like that night, he didn't stop Vanessa from leaving._

* * *

He had tried to call her before he left, but she didn't take the call and truthfully he hadn't expected her too. buzz, buzz His phone went off on his leg, looking at the I.D. he saw that it was Biggs, "Biggs? How is she?" He asked in a rush.

"I see you got my message," Biggs said vaguely.

"How is she?"

"Alive."

"What the hell does that mean? What's wrong I couldn't hear what you said."

"Dude where are you, I'm getting horrible reception. Barely hear you!"

"I'm on a plane," that was all Biggs needed to hear.

"Hey Alec I can't hear you very well, I'll call ya later!" And he was gone, leaving Alec still in the dark.

* * *

"You know you are evil right?" Cindy asked walking up from behind Biggs, startling him for a second.

"What are you talking about?"

"Don't play innocent, I know what you're up to and as much as I would like those together, I don't like your game." Cindy stated looking him straight in the eye, "Alec thinks something is wrong with my Boo doesn't he?" When Biggs didn't answer, Cindy raised an eyebrow, "Doesn't he?" She repeated.

"Yes, but he needs to be here for her, not Cale." Biggs explained, "It would kill Alec to find out that he had a child and someone else raised it, especially if that child was with Max. He still loves her, and she loves him! But those two are so fucking stubborn they'd rather be miserable than sucking it up and getting over the hurt." Cindy nodded her head in agreement.

"But we aren't in control of them, Biggs. And whether we want those two together or not, we don't control that. I see what you're trying to do, and I commend you for being a good friend. But I don't want to see either Alec or Max hurt anymore than they already have been. I saw what it did to them both on the first night; it doesn't need to happen again." Saying her peace, Cindy got up and walked away. Biggs knew where she was coming from and couldn't help but agree with her. But things were already set in motion, and that was how it needed to be.

* * *

The moment Alec landed in Seattle, he bee lined for Biggs apartment and luckily his friend was there, "Where's Max?"

"She's at her apartment I would think," a half-asleep Biggs answered trying to wake up after finally going under. It was around 6 in the morning and he still had a few hours till he had to be at the base. Alec was out the door and off to Max and Cindy's apartment, so Biggs went and crawled back in his bed, not really thinking much about his friends frantic display.

* * *

"Max!" He yelled entering the apartment without knocking. Cindy was the first to appear in her nightclothes ready to raise hell for him storming in.

"Alec what the hell!" She yelled.

"Where's Max?"

"Probably in her room sleeping, why? What's going on?"

"She's ok?" Cindy looked at Alec like he was crazy.

"Cindy what's going on? Who's yelling?" Max's voice sounded as she walked out of her room, also dressed in her nightclothes. Alec swung his attention to Max and froze. Max was wearing a tight tank and showed of her newly acquired curves and baggy night pants that rested comfortably under her protruding stomach. When she saw who was the source of the yelling, she froze her self.

"Max."

"Alec what are you doing here?" Max asked after she regained the ability to speak.

"Biggs said…" Alec couldn't find the ability to complete a sentence, he was just stunned at the changes in her appearance, "your pregnant," was all he was able say, this was Cindy's cue to slowly disappear into the background.

"Yeah," she said shyly, suddenly very aware of her appearance and self-conscious. Crossing her arms over her chest and letting them slink down to rest on her stomach, Max asked, "uh, what are you doing here? Biggs said you were in Europe."

"I am - was - still am, but here for now." He stuttered, "he called me and said something was wrong with you." Max wrapped her arms around her chest and smiled.

"Well as you can see I'm not sick or anything," Max started to bit her lip. Alec just kept staring at her with that gaze that was unreadable and burning. She could remember when he would look at her that way when they- no she couldn't start thinking that. "Why are you here Alec?"

"I told you Biggs-"

"So you're visiting him and he said I was sick?"

"No he called me at my apartment," her heart started to pound. Closing her eyes, Alec paused talking, thinking something was wrong.

"Alec-"

"Max you ready?" Logan's voice came from the doorway, Alec turned to see the journalist staring at him and Max in confusion. "What's going on?"

"Logan this is Alec-"

"We've met," Alec cut in curtly; suddenly the room was filled with not only confusion but also now tension.

"Max we gotta go and get the crib," Logan added to break the silence.

"I'll leave," Alec stormed out of the office, leaving a very stunned woman and oblivious man in his wake.

Crash the same, as was the scotch they served. Alec sat at the bar in the slowly filling hang out. He stared at the object in his hands, shook his head. He had been an idiot and words from his father ran through his mind, _"Manticore soldiers aren't chumps, Alec. So don't become one!"_ Good ole wise daddy dearest and his never-ending wisdom. Taking a sip of his scotch he continued to ignore the growing number of girls trying to get his attention. He wasn't interested, until one came to him, "Alec?" Swinging around on the stool he came face to face with Max looking worried.

"Max, didn't know women could drink when they were pregnant," he said without thinking. When he saw Max's eyes flash and brow furrow, he mentally kicked himself.

"Are you alright?" She asked suddenly and a little rushed.

"I'm fine, I'm always fine." He replied without thinking, again. _'Could I be anymore of an ass to her?'_ Seeing the brush off in his statement, Max decided to save her heart anymore ache and stood down. Sucking in her bottom lip, she nodded; Alec saw this and turned around on his stool.

"It's not Logan's," she whispered to his back and walked away. Max couldn't be there anymore and headed for the door. When she got outside, it was raining and only further ruined her mood, but didn't want to linger at the bar anymore so she began to walk in the rain. Suddenly she was thankful for the rain, it masked her tears that started running down her face when Alec had brushed her off but turning around.

* * *

"Max!" Looking to her left, she saw a car stopped beside her. Hearing a door open she saw Alec come out of the curtain of rain.

"Alec just leave me alone and I'll leave you alone. Go back to Manticore and Europe or wherever you are now. " Max said not looking at his face. She couldn't, she would break and right now she had no strength to

"Max get in the car, I'll give you a ride." Alec reached for her, but she backed up. "Please Max," his tone made her look at him. Letting her guard down she nodded her head and he opened the passenger door for her and ran around the car to get in himself.

* * *


	18. Hold Over You

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

Alec didn't drive to Max and Cindy's apartment. Instead he went to the hotel he was staying at, "why are we here?" Max asked seeing where he was going.

"I'm staying here while I'm in Seattle, it's closer," he answered slightly distracted. When they were in his room, "I'll get you a towel, here," he handed her a plush blue towel. Taking the towel tentatively she nodded her thanks and walked past him further into the room. Grabbing a towel for himself he followed her. Why did things have to be this way for them? Why couldn't everything be like it was when they were together. _"Because she was dating you for your brother,"_ he told himself. "I heard what you said in Crash. Is it true?"

"Is what true?"

"Who's the father?" He needed to know, he needed to know that Max hadn't moved on immediately after him and got pregnant.

"Someone that I care about very much."

"Is it Cale?"

"No, but he'd like to. He wants to adopt the baby after the birth."

"Is he?"

"No, he's not the father." She repeated.

"Am I?" He barely whispered with his heart pounding in his chest. For several frozen moments Max stared at Alec who waited with his heart pounding in ears. Max thought about what to say, should she say yes or release him from the burden of her? Closing her eyes and swallowing a lump in her through she continued to stare into the depths of green she had fallen in love with all over again.

"No," she whispered simply as she saw Alec's eyes shatter in betrayal. He wasn't the father, someone else was. She had moved on and on again. At that thought anger laced through him, wiring him.

"Wow I never thought you were slut," the words left his mouth before they reached his mind. When her eyes widened in shock and hurt, Alec immediately regretted the words. Max lowered her gaze to her protruding stomach and bit her lips to stop a sob from emitting. Biting hard on her lip she tried to regain control over her emotions.

"If you chased me down in the rain and brought me to your hotel room to call me slut, you've succeeded. Now do something else you've succeeded at before, leave." With each word, her voice became stronger and louder. Where she found the strength to do it, Max didn't know. Hormones maybe?

"No I chased you down thinking I still had a chance at making everything wrong right! But once again you've proven to me that isn't possible!" His blood was boiling and skin was burning, all the emotions he had suppressed over the last months were coming to a head.

"Just say what you really are wanting to say Alec! Please I'd love to just hear it all out now! Come on lay it on me! Tell me you hate me, you want me dead, hell call me a slut again!" Max yelled clenching her fists tightly.

"Why did you date me?" That wasn't what Max was expecting him to ask, ask in a voice of a defeated person.

"What?" She asked obviously caught off guard.

"Why did you date me and let me fall in love with you? Just tell me and I'll leave you and Cale alone, I won't bother you anymore." Alec pleaded her.

"I--I was angry," Max felt her self shaking from the events just happening and remembering the past events.

"At what? Me?"

"Yes," she whispered.

"Why?"

"Because Ben told me about you, your parents, Manticore, everything. I felt angry for him. I…"

"What?"

"He told me about when he left Manticore, how everyone was against him," this made that boiling feeling come back at these words. Max had punished him for something he hadn't done! Setting his jaw and letting his eyes grow cold, Max saw this and stopped.

"Punished him? Punished him! My parents and I supported him!" Max took a cautious step back at the rage that filled his words, "obviously my dear brother didn't tell you anything about his time at Manticore. 5 years ago Benny boy was to take the entrance exams to become an official solider of Manticore. Part of that exam is a physical and psychological evaluation. Ben didn't pass, he suffered from depression, always had but never was officially diagnosed."

Walking slowly towards Max with an air around him that screamed rage, Max took another step back. "You see to be a field officer he can't have any setbacks that might be a danger to Manticore or the mission. Suffering from depression makes you dependent on drugs; drugs that might not be available to you at some point. So when he found this out he went into a sudden rage and hate campaign against Manticore. But wanna know what the final tick was? My dad pulled some strings within the network and got him a job at Manticore, mission control and plan. Instead of taking the job with a grateful smile, he stormed out of our family home and lives." By now Alec was standing in front of her, or more like towering over her. "Guess Benny wasn't really as innocent as you thought huh," he sneered. Max didn't say anything just stared at him with a blank expression.

"After he left I let him cool down for a few days and then tried to talk to him, to sum up what he said he said fuck off and that he wanted nothing to do with me or our parents. That was last I talked to him because after that he would ignore my calls and messages, even left the state and moved clear cross country."

"Gee can't imagine how that felt. Getting your phone calls and messages ignored while the person you're trying to talk to moves, clear across country or ocean," Max bit back acidly. Now it was Alec's turn to be caught off guard, "poor Alec, saved his brother and got burned by him too. And then ironically he does exactly what he accuses his brother doing to the woman he claims to love."

"I didn't know that you were formally my brother's fuck buddy."

"Sure you did, what about those pictures you found? Let me guess I'm wearing a blonde curly wig with little white undies? Yep those would be the only pictures Ben had of me. Tell me Alec, why didn't you ever tell me you knew about Ben and I. I mean come on you had to think there was something there." Max was now walking towards him while he took steps back, this person in front of him was no longer a meek pregnant woman with skeletons in her closet. No, she was now a very pissed off pregnant woman who he made the mistake of cornering. She looked like a cornered and very pissed off cat, pregnant cat. It was not a good combination at all.

"Truthfully, at first I thought that but then when there was no sign of you ever existing in his stuff except for those pictures. So I figured you must've been some girl he met and got to let him take photos of you. But instead when I was ready to ask you to marry me you tell me that instead you weren't that, you were everything more to him." Alec bit back. Max laughed a sarcastic laugh at this, it infuriated him to no end when she did this. It was mockingly.

"Well now you know, everything. You knew someone completely different than I did, and yes we use to fuck all the damn time. But you know what, one thing Ben has over you, he never called me a fucking slut, ever." With that Max walked passed him and left the room and hotel all together. That had not been what he wanted to happen when he had brought her to room to talk. Sinking to the bed he leaned his elbows on his knees and covered his face in frustration. Letting out a long sigh he ran his fingers through his tousled hair and clenched it into his fists. Frustration was just the tip of what he was feeling.

Knock, knock, knock


	19. Vanessa and Logan

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

Looking up at the door, Alec jumped up to answer it. "Max I…" his words died on his lips when he saw, not Max, but Vanessa standing there with a small smile on her lips. "'Nessa…" Looking down to the floor he saw a small carry on bag.

"Can I come in?" She asked in a soft, calm voice. Nodding he moved to let her by.

"What are you doing here?" He asked still kind of in shock from his fight with Max and seeing Vanessa.

"I sat down and thought about our fight and I realized I was being a bloody jerk to you and decided that I needed to be supportive of you, not against you." She said in one breath, when he was down she let a big breath as if she had been holding it in.

"You flew all the way here to tell me that?" He asked still standing next to the open door.

"Yes, I shouldn't have let things end the way the did when you left so I figured the only way I can show you that I want to make us work was to fly across that bloody pond and come here to support ya." Walking up to Alec, Vanessa placed a hand on his face and smiled, "I care about you Alec, I want us to work." Alec just stared at her and nodded slightly. Why he was nodding, he really wasn't sure. Was he agreeing with her? Seeing her lean up to kiss him, he began to lean down.

"Alec I need…oh sorry," Max's voice broke through the reverie of the couple and both heads snapped up to see a very shocked Max standing in the door way.

"Max… I thought you had left," Alec asked confused.

"I forgot my jacket…I shouldn't have come back," with that Max took off down the hall leaving a very confused Vanessa and stunned Alec and her jacket laying on the bed.

"That was her?" Vanessa asked, Alec nodded numbly looking back at her. "Not sick I guess," she commented, "she's pregnant…" Vanessa trailed off not sure if she wanted to know more. Alec numbly nodded again, "is it yours?" A knot formed in her throat,_ 'Please don't let it be.'  
_

"No, its not. I asked her already," he said hoarsely. Smiling, Vanessa leaned up and kissed him lightly on the mouth.

"So, do you forgive me for being a total nut?" Vanessa asked cocking her head and giving a flirty smile. The same smile that had attracted him to her, nodding he leaned down and kissed her again. "Good, then I'm gonna freshen up and you're gonna take me out and show me what's so fabulous about Seattle." As she walked away from him she started to strip and gather things from her bag. When she was down to underwear and bra he realized what had truly attracted him to her. '_Shit,'_ was all he thought as he closed the door to the room.

* * *

Max walked aimlessly around Seattle for a while before she finally found her self of a familiar front door. Logan. Why had she come here? Not able to answer her self she knocked on the door, few seconds later Logan opened the door and was shocked to see a soaked Max. "Max? Are you alright?" He asked hurriedly ushering her inside his apartment.

"Yeah, got caught in the down pour," she answered smiling slightly as he grabbed a towel and wrapped her in it.

"You shouldn't be out like this, you'll get sick," he answered not really paying attention to her answer. Instead he walked to his couch and grabbed the nearest wool blanket. "Why were you out walking?"

"Logan! I'm fine, I just got caught in the rain. I'm fine, just a little too wet for my own good," Max said catching his attention. The bespectacled man nodded and backed up to sit in a chair across from his sofa. Looking down and her hands Max started to fidget. Things had been strained between the two of them ever since he had asked to adopt her unborn child. "Logan…when you asked to be the father…did you mean it?" She asked, her voice growing small and unsure. When she looked up she saw that Logan's eyes were wide and staring at her with shock on his face.

"Yes I was," he answered truthfully, Max knew he meant it. Looking back down at her hands she had no idea what she was doing. "Why?"

"I…" she paused, "I was thinking about how you asked me that and I…" she paused again. What was she doing?"

"What Max?" Logan coaxed gently, sitting on the edge of his seat.

"I think that you should be the father of this baby, they are going to need one." She stated, trying to convince herself. "And since the father…well…he…um… he isn't going to be the father then why not someone who wants to be?" Biting her lip Max felt the blood seep into her mouth from the constant biting she had been doing lately. She couldn't look at Logan as her words suddenly washed over her.

"Max…" Logan trailed off blinking rapidly, trying to take in what she had just said. "Ar-are you serious?" When she nodded slightly, he jumped out of his seat and crouched down in front her. Taking her fidgeting hands and wrapped them in his larger hands. "Max," grabbing her attention he stared at her beautiful face, "I would be honored to be the father of your baby." Leaning up he kissed her lightly on the cheek and couldn't help but grin profusely. He was going to be a father, the father of Max's baby.

When Logan agreed to be the father and kissed her lightly, Max didn't feel a relief of knowing her child would have a father. No did she feel any kind of security. No she felt pain flare inside of her and rapidly spread through out her body in a crippling sensation. She had just done something she swore she wouldn't do, ever. She swore she would never give up Alec's right as a father, but today she had. She had lied to him and told him he wasn't the father after she confirmed Logan was indeed not the father. Now here she was in Logan's apartment asking him to be the father, what had she done?

She had betrayed Alec once again; only this time it was something unforgivable, beyond anything to do with Ben.

* * *

"Boo what have you done?" Cindy muttered after Max told her everything about what had happened that day. Everything meaning talking to Alec at Crash and his hotel room, the appearance of some girl in Alec's hotel room, and then showing up to Logan's and asking him to be the father. Max sat in on the couch curled up in a ball staring at the wall opposite of her. She couldn't think just stare. Cindy got up from the couch and walked around the room.

"I know Cindy, I've just fucked up royally." Max whispered still staring. Cindy looked at her friend and shook her head.

"Boo you sure know how to weave some pretty wack webs," with that Cindy stood up and left the room. There wasn't anything she could say or do at this point. Leaving the apartment Cindy made her away through Seattle until she reached her destination. " 'Cuse me, could you tell me what room Alec McDowell is in?" She asked the receptionist sweetly.

"I'm not allowed to give out that information. What do you need?" The receptionist replied.

"I'm a Jam Pony messenger and I need him to sign off to receive his package. So if you would be so kind and tell me his room number," Cindy said with purse of her lips. Seeing that there was no way around this and looked up the room number.

"Room 494 is where Mr. McDowell is residing." Smiling her thanks, Cindy made her way up to room 494.

Knock, knock Few moments later the door opened and revealed a petite blonde dressed in an oversized t-shirt that could only belong to Alec. "Yes?" She asked in a thick accent and a scrutinizing eye.

"I'm here to see Alec," Cindy answered.

"What do you need?"

"I'm here to see Alec, not you honey," she repeated.

"Well Alec is busy so whatever you need you can tell me and I'll relay it," Vanessa answered crossing her arms and jutting her hip out. Cindy guessed she was trying to look intimidating but wasn't.

"Tell Alec to stop whatever he's doing and come and talk to Cindy."

" 'Nessa who's at the door?" Alec's voice came from the bathroom door.

"Hey pretty boy you wanna come and talk to O.C.!" Cindy shouted while staring down Vanessa with a knowing smirk.

"Cindy?" The two women could hear him question, moments later a haphazardly dressed and wet Alec appeared at the door, "hey O.C. how are you?" He smiled seeing her familiar face. Vanessa only scowled.

"Good Pretty Boy, wanna take me for a drink, we need to talk. Now," looking at Alec straight in the eye, Cindy smiled when he understood exactly what she was saying.

"Sure, I'll meet you in the bar downstairs in 5. Sound good?" He answered smiling a friendly smile. Vanessa, on the side, was continuing to scowl at being ignored and left out of this little engagement.

"Sounds good," giving him a smile, Cindy walked away and when the door to the room closed she could hear Vanessa's voice resound, loudly, throughout the empty halls. "Spitfire," she said to herself laughing.

"Who was that?!" Vanessa demanded while seething.

"A friend," Alec replied vaguely while trying to find a clean shirt to pull on. Seeing anger blazing in Vanessa's eyes, Alec sighed, "I know her from when I lived here before. That's all we have ever been, friends." Kissing her on the forehead he left the room and walked to the bar. Sure enough in the back of the bar sat Cindy with a pitcher of beer and a bottle of scotch. "Cindy," he greeted sitting down at the table across from her.

"Drink up Boo, because we are going to have a deep conversation here," Cindy warned handing him a glass and the bottle. Taking it he poured a glass and took and nice long drink.

"This about me storming in at the crack of dawn?"

"No more like why you stormed in at the crack of dawn and more," Cindy responded pouring a glass of beer. "And none of that bullshit of you thinkin' my girl was sick. There's more to the story, you and I both know it." Alex leaned forward on the table and clasped his hands together, no one could ever say Cindy wasn't a hard case or perceptive.

"You should've been a cop instead of a messenger. You're cruel," he said off hand looking at her. When she cracked a smile Alec knew he wasn't in major trouble. "Truthfully? Biggs called me and left a message saying I needed to come back to Seattle and that something was wrong with Max. Didn't say what was wrong, I freaked and caught the earliest flight I could."

"Why would little ol' you come all the way from Europe," Alec looked at her, "yeah I know you left boo, we'll get to that in a minute. Now why would you come all the ways from Europe to check on the girl you left for Europe? I'm curious." The sarcasm in that last bit was obvious. When Alec took another large gulp of scotch, Cindy had her answer but she wanted to hear it for herself. "Keep avoiding me for the scotch I'll take it away and lay that smack down on you." Alec took a deep breath and sighed.

"Because I'm still in love with her and I was hoping I'd have another chance at winning her back." At this Cindy burst out laughing, making Alec confuse and almost feel hurt that she was laughing as he poured his heart on the table. "What is so funny?"

"Chance at winning her back? Boo you say that as if you lost her in the first place!" Cindy shook her head, "you never lost her, Alec. Even after weeks of trying to get a hold of you and finding out you left? You still never lost her, and still haven't." This time it was Alec's turn to laugh, "now you laughing at O.C.?"

"She's pregnant." He stated taking a large chug from the bottle this time.

"And you got a girlfriend who's a spitfire, what does that have to do with you never losing Max?"

"I asked Max point blank if the baby was mine, point blank. And straight to my face she said it wasn't, so I would take that as if I lost her. She's pregnant with some other guys kid!" Cindy shook her head, "what?"

"You two are pitiful you know that? Just down right pitiful." Standing up O.C. grabbed her messenger bag, "if you opened your pretty green eyes you'd see everything was right in front of you like a flashing neon sign. You think you lost my girl? You didn't, never did. But if you wanna know, I think you're close to." Giving one last look at Alec, Cindy left the hotel bar and went home.

When Cindy reached the apartment Max was gone, but had left a note. 'Went to Crash to hang. Meet me there, M.'


	20. Crash Into

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

A.N: Thanks for all the reviews!

With Ben In Between

* * *

When Vanessa and Alec walked into Crash, Alec immediately spotted Biggs and his current girlfriend. Weaving their way through the crowd, Alec was constantly stopped and greeted by familiar people. Every time he introduced Vanessa to people, they seemed to give the same reaction; shock and not a so wholesome welcome to Seattle. He understood, but Vanessa didn't. This was Max's territory, so to speak. Anyone here who knew him knew him to be with Max, seeing him with some other girl was unusual. "Hey man!" Biggs greeted when the duo finally reached the table. The two friends hugged and shook hands. "Alec this is Lindsey, Lindsey my dumbass of a friend Alec." Alec laughed and shook hands with Lindsey.

"Nice Biggs, nice. This is Vanessa," he introduced Vanessa who smiled flirty at Biggs. Sitting down the four started to talk, Biggs wanting to get Alec alone and talk to him about something he couldn't in front of the girls.

* * *

Max sat in the back room where the pool tables had been moved and set up. Needing to get her mind off earlier today and Alec, she talked with friends and co-workers. Getting comfortable on the plush couch, Max watched as Sketchy tried to beat someone at pool, and fail miserably. "Sketchy when you going to learn?" She asked laughing. Sketchy plopped down beside her and sighed.

"Man I was sure I was going to win, I was this close," he said while gesturing with his hands. "You know I heard a rumor today."

"Oh what? Weed is healthy for you?"

"I already know that. Nah, I head that my man Alec is back in town." Max looked away and stared at the next pool game, "seen him?" Max nodded her head, but didn't' look away. "Max, I'm not the smartest one in the room, I know that. But it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure some things out." This got Max's attention, "You and Alec breakup, you turn out to be pregnant right afterwards and won't tell anyone anything about the daddy. It's his kid isn't it?"

"No Logan is going to be the father."

"That's wrong Max, really wrong." Leaning back into the couch he looked at Max, "let me rephrase that. He's the biological father and doesn't have a clue." It wasn't a question.

"It doesn't matter if he is or not, he wants nothing to do with me. And frankly I reciprocate that feeling." Looking at Sketchy with a small smile, "why don't you go buy a pitcher on me and grab a bottle of water while you're at it? Here," she handed him some money and smiled. Sketchy stared at the money and looked at her for a moment. Giving a sad smile, he reached up and squeezed her shoulder before up and going to fetch something to drink.

* * *

Alec had been ignoring Biggs since they sat down. His reason for doing so was because Biggs was giving him hand signals, signals that were saying to meet him at the bar to talk. When Biggs got frustrated he tried another tactic, he leaned forward and whispered something in Lindsey's ear. Since Lindsey knew the jist of things going on, she played along. Moments later Lindsey knocked her beer onto Vanessa's jeans and top, "oh my god! I'm so sorry!" Vanessa stood up quickly the cold liquid hit her.

"Oh! Uh, its ok…accident," Vanessa said weakly looking at her wet clothing.

"Come on I'll help you dry off in the bathroom," Lindsey stood up and ushered the girl away.

"That was sneaky," Alec commented once the girls were out of hearing range. Biggs just smiled and then turned serious, "what do you want to know?"

"Why you are here with Vanessa and not Max."

"Vanessa is my girlfriend and Max is my ex-girlfriend. Big difference and pretty self-explanatory."

"God you are an idiot you know that!" Biggs exclaimed a little too loud, catching some surrounding people's attention.

"What?"

"She's pregnant, that should be pretty self explanatory!"

"With another guy's kid," Alec deadpanned. Biggs just rolled his eyes.

"You know I thought you were the smart twin, guess I was wrong."

"Huh?"

"Do the math, Max is about 5 going on 6 months along. When did you leave? And when was the last time you slept with each other? Do the math," standing up Biggs went to find Lindsey and leave. Alec watched his best friend leave and felt conflicted. Cindy's words from earlier started to ring in his heart while Biggs current words rang in his ears.

"Alec?" Vanessa's voice broke through his thoughts, "ok?" Plastering on a smile, Alec nodded kissed her hand. Vanessa smiled and sat next to him with a dreamy look, and for some reason the look did nothing for him. Giving a weak smile he took a large gulp of scotch from his glass. "Alec, you know the way you've talked about Seattle and your friends I'm surprised."

"Hmm? Why?" Alec asked half heartedly.

"Well you always made them out to be these great people…but all the ones I've met seem to be just bloody rude." Vanessa had turned to face Alec with a raised eyebrow. Alec knew this look, it was a look of determination and wanting an explanation. "Why is that? I mean they are all warm and happy up to the point that you introduce me."

"Nessa…most of my friends here in Seattle I made when I first moved here and…"

"Was dating _her_," Vanessa finished with a sneer.

"Was with Max, yes. We have a lot of mutual friends, and when we broke up I left shortly afterwards. So now that I'm back for a blip of a moment, seeing me with someone else is a little foreign to everyone." Looking at Vanessa, Alec could see plainly that she wasn't pleased with this explanation, and truthfully he wasn't surprised. Vanessa was the type of person who everyone seemed to like and couldn't stand the thought of not being liked. In Europe he had been introduced to her friends, who became his friends, and they were happy. But now, while in Seattle, she wasn't getting the same response he had received, and that pissed her off to no end. "I can't help that Vanessa. I was with Max for over a year, that's how everyone is use to seeing me. With Max, it just takes time."

"There is no excuse, especially one that weak, for people being to bloody rude. I didn't break you guys up!" She said a little to loudly, causing bystanders at other tables to stare. Drinking the last of his drink Alec was ready to leave, Crash wasn't fun and he knew that Vanessa wasn't going to let any of this go.

"Look let's go, I'll meet you at the car. I'm gonna run to the bathroom." Setting her lips into a thin line, Vanessa grabbed her bag and started to the door. On her way through the maze of tables she ran into someone, and seeing this just made Alec's day even worse.

"Excuse me miss," Logan said after he bumped into the woman, holding her shoulders to make sure she didn't fall.

"Oh sorry," she replied smiling sweetly.

"Logan?" Max's voice came from behind the woman. Looking over the woman's shoulders he saw Max walking towards him. When the woman turned around Max stopped and stared. Logan noticed that the woman tensed up.

"Logan…Vanessa….Max?" Turning around Max came face to face with Alec staring at the sight before him. When his gaze settled on Max he just stared at her, immediately feeling an overwhelming about of guilt from earlier, tidal wave him. "Max…" he started, "uh… can we talk? Not like before, just I want to say-"

"Alec I think you need to leave Max alone," Logan interjected, leaving Vanessa behind and walking to stand by Max.

"Look Cale, this is non of you business-"

"Quite the opposite considering I'm the father of her child," Logan stated smugly. "So her health is my business and you stressing her ties into her health and my business." Finished, he wrapped his left arm around her waist and laid his hand on her stomach. This action infuriated Alec to no end.

"Cale, I repeat myself, this is none of your business!" Alec growled out, restraining himself from strangling the bi-spectacled journalist. Logan didn't move, and Max saw the Manticore mask fall over Alec's face and set in place.

"Logan, I'll met you at the car," Max said extracting herself from his arm and moved to stand in the middle of the two men. Letting out a huff, Logan stormed pass the group and headed out of Crash. Vanessa still stood in her spot, glaring at Max and then Alec.

"You have one minute, and I leave," she said before turning around dramatically and following Logan's lead.


	21. I'm Sorry

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

A.N: Thanks for the reviews! I'm really enjoying reading what readers think is going to happen! Thanks again!

With Ben In Between

* * *

"Max-"

"What do you want Alec?" Max asked with little emotion.

"About before-"

"What about it? Want to continue? If so I don't have any patience," when alec didn't respond Max made a move to walk past him. Alec grabbed her upper arm lightly, but firm enough to make her pause and look at him.

"I wanted to say I'm sorry, about what I said. I was out of line…" Sighing and running his hand through his hair Alec looked at the ground. "I never thought of you as a slut or anything like that." When Max didn't say anything, Alec smiled sadly, "I guess congratulations is order for you and Cale." Again Max didn't say anything, "um…I guess that's all I wanted to say, I'm sorry." Letting go of her arm, he let it fall limply to his side and moved his eyes to her stomach before turning to walk away. Walking slower than normal, Alec waited for Max to say something. When it became clear she wasn't he speed up his pace and headed outside of Crash.

Max let Alec walk away and tried to regain some composure. She knew he was hoping she would say something, but when she realized she couldn't think of anything to say she remained silent and without reaction to anything he said. When he apologized she knew he meant it completly, he wasn't the type to say 'sorry' without meaning it. Even though she knew this she let him walk away, it was her turn to send him away.

* * *

The cool air outside did little to cool the heat that was inside of him, he felt like he was suffocating and burning from the inside out. He felt on edge and irritated. Closing his eyes tightly and shaking his head a few times he tried to rid himself of this feeling, but he couldn't; it was embedded in him. What brought him out of his thoughts was the sound of an argument to the left of him. From when he could make out, it sounded like a lovers tiff. Realizing he needed to meet Vanessa, he walked towards the argument and his car where Vanessa was likely waiting, impatiently.

* * *

"I'm with her now! it's over!" He stated for the 5th time.

"Just like that? What about before? you were still more than happy to come to my bed while she was playing house with you!" She retaliated harshly, advancing into his personal bubble. Taking a step back he regained his composure.

"It's over," he stated pompously and would've continued if he hadn't watched as her facial expression change from anger to surprise. Her eyesight directed away from his face to over his shoulder. Turning to see what she was staring at he was greeted with Alec standing there with a raised eyebrow. Wonderful.

* * *

When Alec reached the alley that lead to the parking lot he was surprised to discover whom the lover's tiff was between. "Well, this was unexpected," he commented when the two turned to him. Asha didn't say anything, just stared over Logan's shoulder, while Logan resembled a fish breathing under water. "Please don't stop on my account, I'm just going to my car." Alec started to walk towards the duo to pass them when he stopped in front of the other man, "treat her right or I'll kill you." He said in a soft but hard, low voice. When he said it, he looked Logan straight in the eye and made sure the man knew that he meant every word. "I ever hear otherwise I will find you, don't ever think otherwise." With that Alec nodded and smiled at Asha and continued on his way to find Vanessa.

* * *

Three days later Alec and Vanessa made their way through the bustling airport. They were leaving Seattle, Alec leaving behind some much more. "I'll go check us in," Vanessa offered as she pulled their i.d's and tickets from her oversized tote bag. Nodding he took her suitcase and went to find a place to sit while he waited for her.

Pulling out his cell Alec began to turn it off when something stopped him. It was his old cell phone, the one he had when he had lived in Seattle. He hadn't even realized he had brought it with him on the trip. Seeing the phone he remembered all the messages left by Max, and then the conversation he had with Biggs.

"_I miss her. I miss her, I love her, and I hate her at the same time. Is that possible?"_

"_Apparently so because you're feeling it right now." _

"_Have you seen her?"._

"_Uh, yeah I saw her this morning. She delivered a package to the base." _

"_What did she say? Did she ask about me? How'd she look? Is she ok_

"_Whoa, one question at a time. We ran into each other in the hall and talked for a few minutes. She said she had been trying to get a hold of you. Man you didn't tell her you were leaving. That's low."_

Pulling out his correct phone, Alec dialed a familiar number and prayed there would be an answer. _"Hey you've reached Cindy and Max. Leave a message and we'll hit ya back!" Max and Cindy's voice filtered through the speaker._

"Hey…It's Alec, just calling to say bye. I'm…flying out today, back to base. Thought I'd say goodbye this time… O.C. miss you and Max…I am sorry about everything I said. Good luck and congratulations. Bye." Hanging up his phone he stared at the phone for a few moments. His thoughts didn't go very far or deep though, Vanessa arrived with their confirmation papers and ready to head to their gate.

"Ready?" Alec looked up and smiled. Nodding his head and he stood up and walked with her. Few steps in, Vanessa laced her fingers with his and gave him a big smile; A smile that reminded him of someone who had just won the lottery.


	22. DENIED

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

"Alec! Ben! Report to the living area!" Set of identical hazel eyes opened wide from their deep sleep, seconds after that the sound of running feet could be heard tumbling down the wooden stairs. Both boys immediately stood at attention in front of their father who was dressed head to toe in his training fatigues. "Your letters from the Academy have arrived," he said in a stern, commanding voice. Pulling out two basic manila envelopes he handed each of the boys their respective one. Before they were instructed to open them, the tore into the paper and quickly scanned the letters. Seeing their reactions, the General cracked a smile that only a proud father and commanding officer could wear. "Congratulations, I'm very proud you both!"

Alec stared at the letter; he was accepted to the academy, to Manticore. This was what his entire life had been centered around, this one moment. So why didn't it feel like that? Looking out of the corner of his eye he saw his brother wearing the biggest grin he had ever seen. This was Ben's moment to shine, he was the future military prodigy of their family, everyone knew that. But because of their father's involvement in the Manticore project, Alec had to automatically apply to the academy for schooling; If he didn't then he would continue his education elsewhere, where he wanted to be. Taking in a deep breath, he put on the face of an excited teenager, the mask he had mastered.

* * *

Clapping Ben on the back Alec gave off his cocky smirk when his twin faced him, again, this was Ben's moment.

"So what do you want to do after graduation?" Ben asked Alec as they dressed in their Manticore ceremonial suits.

"I don't know, something away from the military. Maybe boxing professionally, I always did kick ass at that." Alec replied with a smirk as his brother checked every thread of his suit, to make sure he was impeccable. "You applying for field?"

"Best place to show you're a solider," Ben replied confidently. Looking his twin he smiled, of the two he had been the nerdy and shy, while Alec had been the jock and social one. The military scene had never been Alec's wish, he knew that and so did their family. That was fine, as long as General McDowell had a heir to his empire of military history.

* * *

"Captain McDowell?" A voice from behind Alec called him. Turning around he was faced with his father's secretary Lucy.

"Yes?"

"The General would like a word with you in his office, now." Blinking in confusion he followed her through the halls for the final time. He was done with Manticore. When Lucy knocked on the door, Alec stared 3 feet behind her to wait to be told to go in. "Sir, Captain Alec McDowell to see you," Lucy said into the office. Hearing a gruff response, Alec waited for Lucy to open the door more so he could pass. "Go right in," she instructed moving away from the door and Alec.

"Alec, sit," The General instructed before he was even in the door. Something was up, his father looked exhausted and worried.

"What's the problem, sir?"

"It's Ben."

"What about Ben?"

"As you know your brother applied to be a field operative immediately after graduation." Alec nodded, "the results came back today. They were given to me before officially sent off. Look at them." Alec took the out stretched packet of papers from his father. Looking at the weathered look on the elder's face, Alec turned his attention to the papers. As he expected, Ben was an outstanding candidate, scores perfect and beyond. So what was the problem? Flipping through some of the papers he came across the health pages. He wasn't eligible.

Alec felt his heart stop and a pounding sound erupt in his head. He couldn't breathe or move, his entire world had just shattered in billions of shards.

'**Captain B. McDowell meets all the listed physical requirements expected of a field operative. However the matter of a psychological capacity is not completely met. It seems that Cap. B. McDowell suffers from the psychological disorder known as Bi-Polar, a.k.a. depression. This would make him dependent on drugs, therefore un-able to become a field operative of Manticore Military. **

Request for Field Operative status: DENIED'

Alec collapsed into a chair behind him when seeing the word 'denied.' The bold red letters stuck out from the page and held so much meaning. Not only the end of his brothers dreams and plan, but his as well. He knew why his father was showing him the report, he wanted him to take Ben's place. Keep the family face up. Closing the report brokenly, Alec stared at his father with a broken look.

Whether his father understood what he was feeling or even cared, Alec didn't know. What he did know what that all his father cared about, at this moment, was keeping the family reputation in the highest standards. And when family comes first, it doesn't matter what your plans were before that very moment because they no longer held any value, especially when Manticore is involved.' When you sign up for Manticore, they have you sign in your blood, for life.' Alec thought tossing the report on his father's desk and walking out of the office without being dismissed or acknowledging his father's words.


	23. Lottery Loser

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

"Alec!" Vanessa yelled with frustration. Alec just ignored her yelling and continued to pack her things. "STOP!" She tried to grab her clothes from him but ended up tripping herself instead. She landed ungracefully on the ground with a un-lady like grunt, and Alec didn't even look at her as he continued his assault on her things. "Why are you doing this?"

"I don't want to you live with you anymore, get out." He said simply as he grabbed two trash bags and tossed them out the front door of his apartment. Vanessa scrambled to try and drag them back inside.

"What!" She yelled standing right in front of him, trying to hold her ground against his towering figure. Placing her hands on her hips she set herself solid against him.

"You wanna go fuck some guy, be my guest, but I don't want you coming home to me afterwards. Now that is out of the way you can pack yourself the rest of the way out of my apartment. I'll be back in two hours, every trace of you better be destroyed or gone." With that he grabbed his jacket and keys and walked out of the apartment like he was going for a mid-day walk.

Alec walked aimlessly through the streets, just taking in everything around him. Since he had moved across the pond, he had never really seen what was around him. Sure he had seen the nightlife, but that was it. He worked on base all the time training future operatives and on the weekends he usually let exhaustion take over and let his body recuperate. Right now he was given a week leave, and the first thing he did was exterminate an infestation problem he had at his apartment. Vanessa. A buddy of his from the base had broken the news to time a few days before he was granted leave.

* * *

"_Hey McDowell!" Lt. Shavers jogged up to Alec and started to run along side him on the track._

"_What's up, Jas?" Alec asked once they set a mutual pace._

"_You still with the Vanessa chick?"_

"_Yeah why? Want her?" Alec joked, not really seeing where this was going._

"_Really? That's funny because lately I've been seeing her at this hotsy totsy bar with some moneybags. All over him and everything." Alec abruptly stopped and stared at the Lt. with question. "Thought you should know before you makes you a fool." Shavers offered staring at Alec. Pursing his lips and nodding his head, Alec took in a deep breath._

"_Thanks, I needed to know. Now, what bar?"_

* * *

That night he had followed Vanessa to the bar and sure enough she met up with some guy. Because of the lighting and angle, he wasn't able to make out who the guy was and frankly he didn't care. She cheated, that's all that mattered and frankly he was done with her. The only reason he'd want to know who the guy was to warn him and wish him luck, but he didn't feel like doing that now.

The next day he had requested leave for a week, and once it was granted he began today's activities. So here he was now, walking around deep in thought. So deep in thought he didn't see the café tables with people, nor did he see the woman walking from a table in the shade. One minute he was walking the next he was laying on his back in a puddle with a person on top of him trying to get up. "Sorry," he muttered squinting at the blinding sunlight in his eyes.

"Alec?"


	24. Regretful Reunion

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

A.N: Thanks for all the reviews!

With Ben In Between

* * *

_He stared out at the rainy, bleak world through the window of the loft. It was quiet tonight, well as quiet as it could be in the big city he lived in. at times like this, when he was alone to think, he would always think about the past and everyone there. He would go back to those times and places that seemed to still haunt him, in a good and bad way. At these times even the Blue Lady could put his mind at rest._

_Thinking of that, he fingered the pendent that hung around his neck. He couldn't help but smile as his thumb ran over the inscription on the back. It always did make him smile, and it also always reminded him of when he had received it. It had been a gift from Alec when they had graduated to weapons training. There father had been so proud of them, he threw a huge celebration party for them._

_After they had had their fill of the celebration, Alec and he had stolen some alcohol from the bar and snuck off to have their own party at "their place" or the "high place" as Alec nicknamed it._

* * *

"_Ahh, no place like the high place!" Alec joked as he reached the old shack. Walking around the small area he began to light the many candles, lighting up the place. Ben smiled and pulled out the bottles of liquor and inspected what had been stolen._

"_Are we getting wasted tonight brother?" Ben joking asked as he read the labels Alec had acquired. Scotch, Jack Daniels, and Hot Damn. _

"_Why not? Even perfect soldiers break the rules. Besides be deserve it!" Alec replied pulling out their hidden shot glasses. Grabbing the bottle of scotch, he took a swig. Grabbing a stool, Alec kicked the other one to his brother and sat down. As Ben sat down, Alec pulled something from his pant pocket and tossed it his brother. "Congrats," he said simply._

_Opening the box Ben saw a beautiful gold pendent with the Blue Lady engraved in the center. Surrounding the image of the Lady, was a Latin inscription reading, 'The Blessed Blue Lady.' Picking the pendent out of the box. Ben realized there was something on the back. Flipping the pendent over, Ben couldn't help but crack up laughing when seeing what was there._

"_To Benny_

_From the goodlooking #1"_

"_Thanks Alec," Ben laughed._

"_Welcome, now get drunk!" Alec tossed the bottle in his hands at Ben, who laughed and took a long hard swig from the bottle._

* * *

_And they did that night, get drunk. It was one of the last times he spent free time with Alec, before their falling out. Thinking of that made Ben miss his brother even more. He also felt a clench in his gut. Guilt. It was his fault, he knew that now and he knew it then. But he had been blinded then and taken his rage out of Alec, the one who in the end lost everything. His life of freedom he had so desperately wanted._

_Sighing Ben pushed away from the window. He had been doing this a lot lately, Thinking and regretting. Ever since Max had taken a trip to Seattle to see her friends. "That's it," he grabbed his jacket and keys and left his loft. He needed to make things right_

'_Information. City and state please.'_

"_Washington D.C."_

'_Name please.'_

"_Alec McDowell."_

"_One moment please. The address is Manticore Base 1, Lydecker Hall, Apartment X5-493." Clicking his phone off, Bean reached his car and immediately peeled out of parking._

* * *

_RING RING RING_

"_Hello?"_

"_Yes this New York Memorial Hospital, I'm calling for Alec McDowell."_

"_This is he," Alec mumbled trying to wake up enough to process what was being said to him._

"_I'm calling about a patient we currently are treating, Ben McDowell." You were listed as next of kin." At hearing this, Alec shot out of his bed and immediately found clothes and shoes, "is this correct?"_

"_Yeah, he's my brother, what happened?"_

"_He was in a car accident-"_

"_Listen, I'll be there as soon as I can!"_

* * *

"_Hi I'm Alec McDowell, my brother is a patient here!" Alec rushed to the front desk._

"_Mr. McDowell?" A voice came to the left of him._

"_Yeah," turning a man stood in front of him in a white lab coat._

"_I'm Dr. Sandeman, I'm responsible for treatment of your brother." Taking the doctor's out stretched hand, Alec waited for more information to mentioned. "Come with me," following the doctor Alec found himself in the ICU ward. There, for the first time in 5 years, Alec saw his brother. "He was hit by a car while standing on the side of the raod."_

"_Will he be ok?" Alec asked in a small voice. He was standing at the side of the bed staring at his brother's battered body. It didn't seem real. When he heard the doctor sigh, alec swiftly turned his attention to the other man._

"_I'm afraid he is brain dead, and there is very little chance of ever regaining conscious. We did everything we could. When every option was exhausted we placed him on life support to wait for further instruction from the family, you." Seeing Alec's reaction the doctor bowed his head, "I'm sorry to give you this news. I'll leave you alone. Find me if you need anything." With that Dr. Sandeman left._

_Alec collapsed in the chair beside him. His brother was brain dead. How was it possible?_

* * *

_An hour later, Ben McDowell passed away with his twin brother by his side. Alec felt as if a part of him died with his brother._

_After the necessary arrangements were made and papers were signed, Alec left the hospital and found the closest convient store that sold the hardest liquor. When he acquired the said product he parked himself across the street of Ben's apartment building and drank himself into a stupor._

_Two days later, Alec finally worked the courage to go to his brother's living space. Biggs flew into town to help him with the packing and moving of things. "Are you sure you can handle this?" Biggs asked his stoic friend as they pulled flattened boxes from Alec's jeep. Behind his sunglasses and low slung baseball cap, Biggs saw a faint nod of Alec's head as an answer. When everything was gathered the two headed to the front doors of the building._

"_Excuse me," a woman spoke as she walked backwards with a large box in her arms._

"_No problem," biggs smiled and held the door open for her, and her companion who held the other end of the box. The second girl didn't acknowledge either of the men, instead kept her face down, hidden behind a cap and a mop of dark curly hair._

_When the door was clear, the two men headed to the top of building, to Ben's loft._

* * *

"_You got everything you want?" Viv asked Max as they loaded the last box into their moving van._

"_Yeah," Max whispered thickly as she pulled her cap off and ran a hand through her unruly curls. "Thanks," she said not looking at the other woman. Viv pulled max into a hug and let her cry once again on her shoulder._

* * *

_Stepping into the place his brother had lived for 5 years was one of the hardest things Alec had ever experience. Even though had never been there before, waves of memories hit him with an unspeakable force. Realization that would never be able to reconcile with his brother either stabbed him with a rigid knife. Ben, his brother and once best friend, was dead._


	25. Opening Ben's Box

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

A.N: Thanks for all the reviews!

* * *

--One Week After Leaving Seattle--

After seeing Max and everything that had happened in Seattle, Alec finally found the courage to open the last box of his brother's belongings. The box contained private things of Ben's that Alec could never stomach going through, until now. Over two years later.

The first thing Alec saw was a thick bound album with papers sticking every which way from side it. Opening it Alec felt a wave of emotions, on the first page was the last picture ever taken of him with Ben. They both had their arms around each other and were smiling to the camera. He remembered when it was taken. Two day's before they found out that Ben wasn't eligible for field operative work, two day's before he saw his brother for the last time.

Taking a deep breath, Alec flicked through the pages. Most of what he saw were certificates of awards or letters from Manticore. It wasn't until he got to the middle of book that Alec felt more emotions. An entire page was of news clippings about Manticore, about him. By each clipping was little notes written in his brother's handwriting, notes that said things like 'I'm proud of him.' 'Wish I had been there.' 'Way to go.' Just things like that, but it meant so much to him. After reading each one he continued to flip through the pages. Some had pictures of Ben with strangers, some were of Ben and him in training or with common friends. At the back of the book was letters, his letters that he had sent Ben trying to reconcile with him. Ones he had never known if Ben had received or not. Seeing them opened and obviously read, made Alec somewhat happy to know his brother had received his letters and read them. If only he knew what he had thought.

Closing the album, Alec found random things that made little sense to him, notes or reminders to do things. As he worked his way to the bottom of the box Alec felt like he re connecting with his brother for the first time in so long. Towards the bottom there were several rolls of un processed film, which Alec doubted were any good at this point. But figured maybe he'd get them processed, see what his brother saw through a camera lens. There were letters addressed to Ben from businesses, commending his artwork and praising his talent from behind the camera. Who'd thought that the perfect soldier, through and through, was an artist in the making? Alec smiled, knowing Ben had found something to be passionate about, outside of Manticore, this knowledge made him happy.

At the very bottom of the box was a lone envelope, with his name and address on the front. A letter for him from Ben? Picking it up Alec's hand began to shake, what was inside?


	26. The Letter

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

_Dear Alec,_

_Believe it or not I'm writing this letter at my own will, not someone forcing me. Bad joke and bad beginning, but I was never the one with a way of words that was you. I was the dutiful soldier who didn't know anything but that and when I was faced with a reality I didn't know I took it out of you. I'm sorry._

_It's been almost 5 years since I last talked to you, little over 4 years since you stopped calling and writing me. I guess me ignoring you gave you a message. A message I really didn't want sent out, but was too stubborn to do otherwise. For that I hate myself._

_Something has changed in me in the last two years, I met someone, her name is Max and she is everything I could ever want in a girl. Yes a girl finally changed me, you were right. I met her when she first moved to New York and I think I feel in love with her from the start. She's stubborn bitch who doesn't let anyone tell her what to do, you would love her, and with this letter I hope you will meet her soon. I'm wanting to marry her, but before I do I want to make things right, right between you and I. I want us to be a family again, and I want Max to be apart of it. The family we had outside of Manticore and dad's pride. I miss it, and have from the moment I cut it off. I've never been able to forgive myself for doing that either._

_I seem to be going in too many directions with this letter, but oh well. I have so many things to say, but have no idea how to write them out. I've been a coward for too long, and in a way still am. I'm writing you a letter instead of calling you or driving to see you. But I guess I'm hoping you'll do what I'm afraid to do. Maybe once we are face to face, I'll be able to tell you everything I've wanted to say since that day 5 years ago._

_What I can say, again, is I miss you, and I miss being your brother._

_Your brother,_

_Ben_


	27. Picture

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

A.N: Thanks for the review! Keep them coming please!

* * *

"Alec?" Alec's eyes snapped open and stared at the person on him.

"Max?" He asked shocked. Sure enough a very pregnant Max was on her side, on top of him. She held a shock look that likely mirrored his own. Once he was able to stand up and help Max up, the two seemed to be as a sudden stage of silence, which was a rarity for them. "So…Max what are you doing here in Europe?" Alec finally asked as he helped her sit down at a nearby table at the café. He kept looking everywhere but her face…and stomach. Hands, his hands then hers, but that made him want to hold her so he resorted to the table, no connection to Max, safe.

"I'm here with Logan, he's here on some business." Max answered smiling slightly noticing Alec's distant and obvious discomfort. "So you live here in the city?"

"Yeah, about 5 blocks that way," he said pointing in the direction towards his apartment. "How you long you here for?"

"Uh till the baby is due actually," Max said smiling and rubbing her hand around her stomach. "Logan has a lot of business to do here so we're just going to wait it out and fly back to Seattle after the birth." Alec nodded and smiled; she looked beautiful and happy.

"So what are you doing right now?" Alec asked shrugging his shoulders up and stuffing his hands into his pockets of his jeans.

"Just enjoying what little energy I have," Max replied taking a sip of her drink. "What about you? Where's Vanessa?"

"Uh…" Alec rubbed the back of his neck, a habit that told Max something had changed since they had last seen each other. "We just broke up."

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to bring things up."

"It's ok, I ended things."

"Why? You guys seemed to really connect in Seattle," Max offered trying to sort out the raging emotions she was feeling. _'Damn hormones!'_ She cursed inwardly while she tried to stomp everything she was feeling. _'Be numb! Be numb! Damnit!'_

"Uh," Alec leaned his elbow on the table and ran his hand through his hair. "She was cheating on me with some guy, I found out and ended it." Alec looked at Max's shocked face, "it's all go though. I was tired of being asked if she looked fat or what color of pink looked best." Max couldn't help but laugh at the little jab as he made a face of disgust at the mention of pink. _'He always hated the color,'_ she thought as she felt herself begin to relax in his company.

From there the two talked, not about their past together, Ben or Seattle. They just talked for the first time in a long time, and it was refreshing. Likely would've stayed there for most of the day if Alec hadn't realized he had somewhere to get to. "Hey I have to stop by a place and pick something up. You wanna walk with me? It's just a few blocks from here." Nodding Max started to stand up, but found it a little more difficult than planned. Seeing her difficulty, Alec took one of her hands into his and wrapped the other around her waist, hoisting her to her feet in no time.

"So where we off to?" Max asked as they walked away from the café.

"Uh, a camera store."

"Taking up photography?" Max joked.

"No, I found some old rolls of film and thought I'd see what's on them." Alec explained as they reached the little storefront. Opening the door Max walked inside and was quickly surrounded by cameras and machines to enlarge pictures.

"So you don't what on them?"

"Actually no, they aren't mine." Alec answered as the clerk walked from the back of the store and saw him.

"Ah, here for those pictures?" He asked in a thick accent. From under the counter, the older man pulled out several thick manila envelopes. "I worked with the film as much as I could. Some weren't so lucky; other's not too bad. Need to take better care of you film young man," the clerk joked handing the folders to Alec. "You can take them to a station and view them before you pay."

"Thanks," Alec and Max walked over to a viewing station in the far corner of the room where two chairs resided with it. After they both say, Alec felt himself start to breath a little erratic. _'Another step in meeting who my brother became,'_ he thought opening the top envelopes, but didn't pull the pictures out. "Max…" Max turned and looked at him with a questioning look. "You should open these," pushing the folders in front of her Alec sat back and bit his lip.

"Why? They're yours Alec."

"No they aren't. I found them in an old box of Ben's, I was going to send whatever turned out to you." Alec whispered, afraid to see what her reaction was. When he finally built the guts to look at her she was lightly running her finger over the paper and had a thoughtful look on his face.

"It's funny, no matter what he's always with us, isn't he?" She asked, giving a small smile, this confused Alec. "He was your brother Alec, and he was someone very special to me. I think we both earned the right to look at these photos of whatever they may be. How bout we look at them together and go from there?"

Alec wasn't sure what to think of Max's assessment of the situation, and he didn't know what to say to it either. So to save a good thing gone wrong, Alec nodded and took the envelope and pulled the pictures out. Max saw the first image first and couldn't help but let out a small gasp. It was of her with some friends of Ben's, it was from early in their relationship. The following pictures were of friends, random people Ben encountered and so on.

Not knowing any of the people in the picture, Alec was effected in a different way. He was seeing a part of his brother for the first time. Every so often Max explained who was depicted in the picture or explained the events of the day leading up to the picture. Once they were finished with the first envelope Alec decided that he would just pay for it all and view the pictures, with Max, in private since this was going to be a very emotional rollar-coaster for the both of them. "Let's go somewhere else and look at them," he suggested as Max placed the pictures in their package, "I'm going to go pay for them and we can go look at them somewhere else. I think this place is a little to open to go through this in the open." Max smiled and wiped a tear from her eye, nodding her head she hugged the stack of packages to her chest. _'He always could read how I was feeling,' _Max thought to her self as he helped her up and left to go pay for the pictures.

"So where should we go? My hotel with Logan is clear across town, we could go there," Max asked as they walked the way they had come from before.

"My apartment isn't too fare, we could go there and I'll give you a ride back to your hotel." Max smiled and nodded; weaving her arm through his she looked ahead of them to see where they walked. She didn't see Alec's face go from a small smile to total shock, and then to a shit-eating grin. She also didn't see his eyes flash like they use to all the time, like she always loved them too.


	28. Chinese, Wine and Dine

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

A.N: Thanks for the reviews!

* * *

"Welcome to my humble abode!" Alec announced as they entered through his apartment, and he checked to see that Vanessa was gone. Sure enough she was, as well as her things, and he opened the door wide enough for Max to walk in. "Make your self comfortable, I'll get us something to drink." Walking into the open living room, Max marveled the comfortable apartment. Setting the pictures down, she walked over to the huge bay window that looked out to the city. "Water good for you?" Alec asked from behind her. Turning around she nodded and took the out stretched glass.

"Nice place you have here," Max commented sitting down on the very comfy couch. Alec sat in a single chair next to the couch and watched Max take in his apartment. It wasn't really decorated, very sparse, a lot like his old one in Seattle. Besides furniture, he had some pictures of friends and family, or adventures. Since finding pictures in Ben's stuff he had some of the pictures framed; like the one of him before their falling out. "I remember that picture, the one of you and Ben together." Alec froze and saw her get up to look at the picture. "I caught him going through this huge album he had in his desk, he was looking at this picture. I think that was the first time he ever told me about you two, briefly anyway. Later on he told me about the falling out, Manticore and how you guys grew up." Max picked the picture up, "but even after that I'd find him looking at that picture all the time." Alec didn't say anything, just watched her.

Anytime before, he would have resented her telling him something personal like that. But for some reason, he didn't. Instead he couldn't help but feel something different, what he wasn't sure. "That was at a graduation party, a friend of ours hosted it. This girl that was in our unit, Lola, took that picture." Alec explained as Max replaced the picture to its spot and walked over to him.

"Should we try and open another set of pictures?" Max asked after a few moments of silence. For a few more moments they stared at each other, both feeling a roaring of emotions and feelings raging inside of them. While thoughts rush through their respected minds with questions and memories. "Or should we try for another day," she tried swallowing a large lump in her throat.

"Uh…It's up to you," Alec tried, taking a large gulp on his water, very much wishing it was the strongest scotch he owned. _'Damn!'_ Max bit the side of her lip before she reached for an un-opened envelope and opened the seal. When Max's face changed, "what?" Alec watched as her face went from thoughtful to surprised. She didn't say anything at first, but instead handed the pictures to him. Taking the pictures uneasily, Alec looked at them. They were of…him? They were of him in his uniform. Looking at the people around him, it was only a few years ago, when he was in New York for business and Manticore events. Ben had been there. Some where of him and Biggs talking, posing for someone else, and there were others of him alone staring off into space. The last picture was of him with their parents, his dad clapping him on the back with a proud smile on his face, with his mother smiling the smile she always wore in public to events for Manticore. The painted smile of a military wife. But Alec himself was wearing a blank face.

"I didn't know he was there that day," he whispered staring at the last picture. Somehow Max was able to stand up by her self and move to sit in front of Alec on the table. Taking his hands into her own Max weaved their fingers together. Alec's face shot up and stared at her.

"I…" she started, but realized she didn't know what she wanted say. Deciding not to say anything she just have his hands a squeeze so he knew that she was trying to be comforting. When he quirked the sides of mouth up, she knew she had succeeded. "I think two packets is enough for today, how about we grab some dinner and meet up tomorrow to continue." Alec looked back down at the picture and then her, nodding he placed the picture behind her on the table and stood up.

"How about I order some take out? They have good Chinese here too," he offered. Laughing, Max nodded and held her hands up for help to get up.

"You call Chinese, I'll call Logan and tell him the plans. I'm sure he's still doing business or whatever anyways." When she was standing up, Alec handed her his phone and then proceeded to use his cell to call in their food.

"_Hello?_" Logan's voice filtered through the receiver.

"Hey, it's Max. I ran into someone and I'm going have dinner. Just calling to tell you the plan so you didn't wait up," Max said in one breath.

"_Ran into someone? Who_?" Logan questioned.

"Uh, Alec actually. He lives here in the city, we ran into each other and decided to catch up. We're going to get some take out," Max explained knowing what was to come.

"_Max do you really think that is a good idea? I mean he's your ex, and you guys didn't part on good terms-_"

"Logan, yes it is a good idea. We're fine," Max interrupted. "I'm fine, it was my idea. I'll talk to you when I get back, ok?" With that she hung up, when she turned to talk to Alec, she found him missing from the room. Furrowing her brow she looked for him, seeing 3 doors to her left she walked to the middle one that was slightly open with a light filtering from behind.

Pushing the door open, she was greeted with a bedroom that was strewn with random articles of clothing and boxes. Yep, definitely Alec's room, he never could keep his bedroom clean. Looking around the room, the walls were mostly bare, except for the few posters he had had in Seattle and some frames hanging up. Walking over to the fare wall with frames Max looked at the pictures, they were some she had seen before, but some were new to her. The newer ones were obviously older in age since they had a picture of Alec and Ben when they were likely younger teenagers with friends. _'He must've found them in Ben's things,' _she thought seeing one of the two sitting on a cliff with a wide-open background behind them. Both were tanned and looked like they were wearing swimming trunk. Ben was sitting behind Alec, making a silly face while Alec was making a sad, puppy dog face. It seemed they had switched roles for the picture. _'It's amazing how much they really looked alike, but there are those subtle differences.'_ One would be their body build, Ben had been lean while Alec was more muscle and chiseled of the two, plus Ben was wearing his golden pendent that glinted in the sun.

"Hey," Alec's voice came from behind her. Turning around she was greeted with him shirtless and holding a shirt in hand. He seemed shocked to find her in his room, well of course he would. She'd be the same way.

"Hey," she said back suddenly embarrassed. "I didn't mean to pry," she explained weakly.

"It's fine, I was just changing while you were talking to Cale." Alec amended, still shirtless. Damn he needed to put a shirt on for the sake of Max's sanity.

"So what did you order? I just realized I never told you what I wanted."

"I got your favorite, or at least what was your favorite in Seattle."

"Oh good!" Max squealed, "I've been dying for Hunan Beef with extra spice!" Alec couldn't help but laugh at her outburst, "sorry. It's been awhile since I've had some real food. Ever since we got here, Logan's been all about the 'wine and dine' setting, and someone can only eat pasta so much before you start craving the real food."

"Ah, Loggie still doesn't know about the world of take out and real food?" Alec joked as he walked over to where she was standing and looking at the picture on the wall. "I see you've discovered some pictures."

"Yeah, I've never seen this picture before. You guys look so young! Where is that place? It's beautiful."

"It was on our family's land. There was this place that was right by that cliff, an old shack in a tree. It was kind of like our place, to get away from everything and be our selves. That was right after we had graduated from basic training to weapons. After the formal party thrown by dad, we had our own party together and then with some friends."

"The high place?" Alec blinked and stared at her. "Ben use to go to the roof of our apartment building, and just think all the time. He said it was the closest to the High Place."

"Yeah, it was a nick name we came up with when we were younger. Ben would always go there to think and get away from things. I'd always tease him bout going there to practice becoming a priest." Alec joked pulling his shirt on.

"Really? I don't think I could really imagine him as a priest. Sure he had the religion down, but priest life I don't think would suit him."

"Yeah me neither, but it was fun to tease him."

"So you never shared the whole Blue Lady thing?"

"No, I respected his choices about it, but never found the answers like he did. When I realized it wasn't a phase, I had his pendent made so when we were training he had something to that effect with him."

"You got him that pendent? He always would wear it, I never saw him take it off. It always seemed like a security blanket type thing for him." Max thought out loud looking at the picture again, "I wish I could've seen you two together. I bet it was always interesting."

"Yes we were the terror twins of Manticore." Alec joked as they walked back into the front room just as there was a knock on the door, "FOOD!" He exclaimed excitedly.

* * *

"So, we have the evening to ourselves," Vanessa purred to her lover as he poured her some wine.

"Alec won't be expecting you?"

"We aren't together anymore," Vanessa said off handedly.

"What?"

"Some how he found out about us-"

"What!"

"He found out about me being with someone else. I don't think he knows it's you," she amended quickly when her lover started to sweat and pace.

RING RING RING

"Hello?" Logan's voice filtered through the receiver.

"Hey, it's Max. I ran into someone and I'm going have dinner. Just calling to tell you the plan so you didn't wait up," Max said in one breath.

"Ran into someone? Who?" Logan questioned feeling a dread creep through him.

"_Uh, Alec actually. He lives here in the city, we ran into each other and decided to catch up. We're going to get some take out."_

"Max do you really think that is a good idea? I mean he's your ex, and you guys didn't part on good terms-" Logan tried to reason, he was officially scared shitless.

"_Logan, yes it is a good idea. We're fine," Max interrupted. "I'm fine, it was my idea. I'll talk to you when I get back, ok?"_ Before Logan could say more, she ended the call. Logan felt his heart pounding; she ran into Alec, they were going to have dinner. Oh god he needed a bottle or two of wine to calm his nerves.

"What's wrong love?" Vanessa questioned when he hung up, pale as can be.

"Alec and Max ran into each other today, they're having dinner." Not seeing the problem, Vanessa sashayed her way over to Logan and proceeded to nip her way up his neck.

"Then they can occupy themselves while we occupy ourselves," she whispered seductively.

"No you don't understand! Alec finds out about us, he'll kill me!" Logan exclaimed, sweating even more.

"He's not going too, Max thinks you are completely devoted to her and the bun. So he isn't going to find out, now to more important things. You have far to many clothes for my taste." It could never be said Vanessa didn't have a way to convince a man to her way of thinking.


	29. Simon Says

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

Following that day of seeing those pictures of Ben's and eating Chinese, Max and Alec spent a lot of time together during the rest of the week. He showed her everything he thought she would enjoy, and some days they just met for lunch or a dinner. Since Logan was busy with business all the time, there wasn't much conflict. But each day they that they saw each other, they would open another packed of pictures.

Some of the packets were filled with pictures that held very little meaning past the fact they were taken by Ben, while there were some that meant the world to one or both of them.

When time came to go back to Manticore, Alec still or talked to Max. things between them almost seemed as if everything that had happened in Seattle, the bad part, never happened.

Ring ring ring

"Hello?"

"Hey Simon!" A voice rang out through the receiver.

"Are you ever going to stop calling me that?" Alec groaned when hearing Rachel over the phone. He lover to death, but he seriously sometimes considered strangling her when she called him 'Simon'.

"Nope, I'd be out of fun," Rachel quipped, "how are you?"

"Tired."

"What have you been up to?" She asked in a way that told Alec she had a mischievous thought in her mind.

"Nothing, get your mind out of the gutter."

"Can't help it when you're friends a tomcat like you. How is life in Europe?"

"Uh…interesting. I ran into my ex-girlfriend the other day." He mentioned rubbing his neck knowing what was to come. Last time he and Rachel had talked, he was ready to propose to Max.

"Who?"

"Max."

"What! You better explain!" Rachel abonished.

"Long story," Alec started before he proceeded to tell his friend everything that had happened starting with when Max had told him about Ben to the point of them running into each other.

"Wow…Alec…you seriously need to find a way to remedy your drama obsession." Rachel commented, "and you also need to get rid of Cale and marry the girl! You're still in love with her and I bet my grand piano and you being forever Simon she loves you too."

"Why would you say that?"

"Because if any guy had ever said or done any of the things you have and I still could stand them, I'd have to be totally in love with them. Sorry Alec you're not that adorable to be just forgiven. There has to be something more." Rachel explained like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"You never ceist to poke fun at me do you? You wound me!"

"Yeah, yeah, well I dated you remember? I know you too well," Rachel pointed. Talking to her in a way relieved Alec of some stress. Being able to just talk to someone about everything that had happened was nice. "I'm going to let you go – don't go blowing up cars or anything. You hear?"

"One time! I swear I never get a break!" Rachel laughed.

"Be good alec. Call me sometime in the next century ok?"

"sorry about that, been busy and all. I'lls tay out of trouble if you do.

"Ok fine, love you Alec.

"You too Rachel." After talking to Rachel, Alec thought about a mixture of things. So much had happened recently, it made his head hurt. Sighing and rubbing his eyes with his heels, Alec headed to bed in hopes his head would stop hurting as sleep took over. But with his luck, there was no such luck. Lying in his bed, pictures that hung on his wall seemed to taunt him, why he didn't know. While thoughts ran through his brain like there was a fast-forward button being pressed. "Ah fuck," he growled hitting himself in the face with a pillow.

_'Why me? Why can't I just sleep and be ok with everything?'_

_**'Because you aren't listening to your self, so your self or the smarter part fights you.**_

_'Shit, I'm talking to myself. Now it's offical. I'm nuts!'_

**_'Nope just exhausted from running. Think of me as...SIMON!'_**

_'Great I'm getting split personalities. From what? I'm not running!'_

**_'And you aren't talking to yourself either. I'm not a personality, more like your better concious.'_**

_'Shut up.'_

**_'You first. You really need to listen to me/you. Simon says LISTEN!'_**

_'Shut up! I'm not running, I'm lying in my very comfortable bed trying to sleep.'_

**_'Your first! You're running from your true feelings while lying in a very comfortable bed that you insisted on bringing from Seattle because of a certain period of memories connected to it and a certain someone.'_**

_'Shut up.'_

**_'You first.' _**

Climbing out his bed Alec started to pace his apartment, he wasn't going to get any sleep tonight.


	30. Forgo Procedure

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

"May I help you miss?" The receptionist enquired when noticing a disheveled woman walking into the main building.

"Yeah, I'm here to see Alec McDowell." Max croaked out over her soar through and silent tears.

"Do you have an appointment?" The receptionist asked moving her hands to the keyboard of her computer.

"Uh, no I don't but-"

"Then I'm sorry, miss. You'll have to leave and make an appointment." The receptionist dismissed turning her attention away from the soaked woman. Max ran her hands through her wet hair with frustration.

"Look I know the procedure here-"

"Then you know that you are to remove yourself from the premises before security is called," the receptionist finished looking pointedly at her.

"Please! Please just call Alec, that's all I'm asking!" Max exclaimed, causing some nearby people to stare, "for once can you say fuck it to the system and call Alec McDowell and ask him to come down here. Please? That's all I'm asking. If he says no then I will walk out of here doing a dance, just please call him? That's all I'm asking, not asking for you to commit a felony." Max stared at the receptionist, waiting for the woman to pick up the pearly white phone. The receptionist took in Max's appearance; she was soaked through from the rain, red blotchy face and very much pregnant. Taking all this in, plus her pleas for her to break procedure, the receptionist felt for her, and picked the phone up to call to command.

* * *

"I'm seeing great improvement, McDowell. Well done!" Lydecker declared as he watched trainees going through the routine training sequences of Manticore basic training.

"Thank you sir," Alec beamed as they watched the last round of trainees complete the water training, or commonly referred as 'The Tank.' "The trainees are hard working, and at this rate we'll be ahead of schedule in due time."

"Excuse me, sir," a voice came from behind the two men.

"Yes?" Lydecker addressed in his authoritative tone.

"There is a young woman at the front desk for McDowell. She doesn't have an appointment or clearance but she refuses to leave." Alec furrorwed his brow trying to figure out who it could be.

"Bring her back," Lydecker dismissed as he turned back to watch the trainee swim to the top of the water and remove their self from the tank. "Expecting someone?" He asked looking at the younger man.

"No, I don't have a clue who it could be." Shrugging his shoulders.

"Guess you'll find out soon enough. How's your parents been? Still in Wyoming?"

"Yeah, dad is thinking of retiring in a few years."

"I can't seem to see your father not working Manticore. He's more Manticore than anyone."

"Yeah, me neither."

"Sir, your guest is here," both men turned to see a soaked and shaken Max walk through the door.

"Max!" Alec exclaimed, losing all composure at the sight before him. Quickly he rushed to her, "what happened?"

"Miss get her a couple of blankets," Lydecker directed to the escort. Alec ushered Max to a chair and tried to get answers.

"I-I-I-I didn't know where else to go," Max sobbed into Alec's chest as he wrapped her in his arms. Seeing her this way not only worried Alec, it scared him shitless.

"McDowell, why don't you take a few days off. Col. Mole can take over." Alec just stared in shock at his commanding officer. One of Manticore's hardest was giving him time off? That was not something he would expect. "I think you are needed elsewhere."

"Yeah, thank you sir," Alec got out through his shock. Collecting Max, he ushered her to his office so he could get the things he needed, then escorted her to his car where he proceeded to drive her to his apartment. It wasn't until they were there, and Max changed in a set of dry sweats, of his, that Alec found out what happened.

"Maxie? What happened?" He asked softly as she curled up on his couch.

"I'm all alone," Max muttered wiping some tears away from her face. "Logan has been cheating on me…I caught him and I blew up. I ended everything, now I'm along and I didn't know where to, you're the only person I know over here." Hearing this Alec hugged her as he began to understand everything. She was in a foreign country, no money and couldn't fly due to being pregnant. "It's going to be alright Maxie," he whispered into her hair. Kissing her lightly on the for head, Alec watched as she played with her hands, a nervous habit of hers when she was distressed. "You aren't alone," he added in a low whisper.

Hearing him say this made Max believe him. She snaked her arms around his waist and listened to his heartbeat against her ear. The soothing rhythm lulled her back to times when he would hold her at night and she would listen to his heart, all those months ago.

* * *

Hours later Alec had finally got Max to lay down and sleep in his bedroom, while he sat on his kitchen counter and thought about everything. To his left he had to guns; the standard issue Manticore gun and the one his father gave him when he was promoted. To his right sat a shot glass with a bottle of scotch. the glass was filled and ready to be knocked back. In front of him was the bay window that showed the city below him. Staring out into the city Alec had to options.

* * *

"Logan! So she found, its over. What's the big deal?" Vanessa asked watching as Logan paced back and forth.

"I love her!" Vanessa couldn't but snort at this, "what?"

"You love her yet you been shagging me since Seattle? And before that there was that little chit at the bar. So obviously you don't love her **that** much." Vanessa counted out on her perfectly manicured fingers. Logan stopped and stared at her, contemplating her words.

"Well, well, well. Money bags and the Nasty."

Both turned to be greeted with Alec leaning in the doorway with a blank face. Both occupants felt a flashing sign of 'Oh Shit!' run through their minds.

"Vanessa why am I not surprised? You always wanted to lead the kept life. Why not bad a loaded, board journalist?" Alec sneered as he walked into the room staring down his ex. "And Logan didn't I make myself **very** clear in Seattle that night in the alley? I think I was; was there a miscommunication somewhere?" Logan gulped and felt him self begin to sweat bullets. At the thought of bullets he couldn't help by wonder if Alec had a gun on him. Logan couldn't tell in the dim lit room and with Alec wearing and black shirt under his black leather jacket.

"Don't have anything to say? Good then you can listen really close. You are to never contact Max **ever** again. You will relinquish all claims to her and the baby, and then you are to pay for O.C. to fly, first class here so that Max has her here for when she has the baby. With O.C. coming here you will also have all of the baby effects sent over, immediately. Clear?" Alec quirked an eyebrow waiting for a response from the older man, Logan nodded numbly. "Good, Cindy has been called, all you need to do is send her the flight details and arrange for the baby things to sent. Night love birds," with that Alec left.

Letting out a breath he had been holding, Logan visibly relaxed. **Click. ** Looking at the sound, Logan saw that Alec had not left, instead he stood in front him with a gun pointed at him. "Just to make sure I've made myself more clear this time." Seeing the older man start to shake, Alec smiled a cold, satisfied smile. "Good," this time he did leave for good.

* * *

"_This is Cindy!"_

"_Hey O.C.!"_

"_Pretty boy! Good to hear from you boo! Max said she had ran into, been giving her the tour of Europe."_

"_Yeah, look you need to pack a few months worth of clothes."_

"_What? Why?"_

"_Because Logan has been cheating on Max and right now she needs you more than ever."_

"_He what! That no good-"_

"_OC! Don't worry, I'm going to take care of him. Just pack your stuff and the info for the flight will be sent to you in the next couple of days."_

"_Ok, sounds good pretty boy. Have my boo call me later, hear me?"_

"_Yes ma'am!"_

"_Good. You're doing good, Alec. You're doing real good. Now go do your Manticore thing on that no good scum of a hetero!"_

* * *


	31. OK

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

With Ben In Between

* * *

"Hey," Max greeted as she saw Alec walk into his bedroom.

"Hey you're awake," he greeted sitting on the edge of his bed. Max laid on her side and absentmindedly rubbed her stomach.

"Yeah," Alec watched her.

"I called O.C., she's going to fly in a few days to be with you. She said to call her." Max smiled at this, but then began to frown thinking about not knowing what she was going to do now.

"Hey what's wrong?"

"I'm pregnant stuck in a foreign country with no money." A single tear leaked out, damn hormones. "I'm scared."

"Everything is going to workout, I promise. Just wait and see, ok?"

"Boo!" O.C. exclaimed as she barged through the front door. Max laughed and hugged her best friend, feeling immediately happy and at home with Cindy being there. Alec walked out of his bedroom when hearing the commotion, "pretty boy!" Cindy pulled Alec into a fierce hug, "thanks." She whispered before letting him go. "So first thing first, what are you wearing boo?"

Max looked at her attire, overly baggy jeans and a baggy 'Manticore' shirt of Alec's. "Didn't bring extra clothes when I left Logan."

"Well then we need to remedy that. Let's go get your things and then do some shopping! You gotta show me the city!" O.C. instructed as she headed back out the door. Max and Alec laughed at this, and Max followed her best friend. "We'll be back later pretty boy!" Shaking his head, Alec went to start on a project.

"So you guys seem cozy together, "O.C. commented as she and Max walked to different shops, after they collected Max's things from the hotel.

"What do you mean?"

"Oh I don't know. You spend a lot of time catching up over Chinese and now you're playing house with each other after the scumbag became one of the many dogs."

"He's the only person I knew here."

"Don't even play like that, Boo. You still love him and he's the father of you baby. He's in love with you too and doesn't know he's the daddy! So get off that 'only person you knew' excuse. That don't fly with O.C." O.C. looked at Max with pursed lips. Max looked at her best friends and smiled, the ever intuitive and all knowing Original Cindy, always there to lay it out for you.

* * *

While the girls were gone, boxes of things arrived at Alec's apartment, Max's baby things. "Well Loggie boo worked quick," Alec said to himself as he moved the boxes to the extra bedroom of his apartment. Once everything was moved he went back to his room and started to clean up, since Cindy was here he figured she could stay here at his apartment so that Max had company. "Looks like the couch will be my new friend," he said to himself as he changed the sheets on his bed.

Cindy and Max walked and chatted for several hours. Max showed her the different places Alec had showed over the time they had spent together, including the café where they ran into each other, literally. "Well boo, I gotta say Seattle don't got much compared to this place!" Cindy complimented as they sat at the café. Max laughed and took a drink of water, "so what are you going to do now?"

"I don't know, haven't thought much about it. Alec keeps telling me everything is going to be alright, and for some reason I believe him and don't think about anything." Max played with her straw, "I'm in deep aren't I?"

"Oh yeah boo, all the way and more." Cindy agreed smiling, "are you going to tell him? You guys have gotten past Ben, I'd think the next step would be baby daddy time."

"Yeah, we have…I don't know. I…"

"Scared aren't you?"

"Yeah, it's scary how easily we fell back in the way we use to be, back in Seattle when we were together. Then I've been living with him? It's…I don't know everything I could want, but then I can't help but feel like everything is going to drop out from under me." Cindy leaned over the table and took Max's hand.

"Tell him boo," it was that simple.


	32. Finally!

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

* * *

With Ben In Between

* * *

Max sat on the overly comfortable couch and absentmindedly stroked her round stomach, every so often she'd feel the tiny person inside of her move. Smiling she felt the baby start rolling around inside her, or so it felt like they were. Grimacing at the pain that followed, she still couldn't help but stare at the sight before her. Alec was sprawled on the opposite couch sleeping. His right leg up over the back of the couch and his left hanging off the side. Being to tall as it is, he looked like a giant on the couch, an adorable boyish giant.

Tucking her pillow more under her head, Max thought about the last few days. It had been a flurry of events and people, it didn't seem like any of it really happened. Logan and Vanessa, Alec and Cindy, everything. Smiling even more she thought about last night, what had happened between her and Alec. She had had one of her hormonal moments of pregnancy and started freaking out about the baby and what she was going to do. Cindy had be out for the evening so Alec was there to pick up the pieces of her, and just because he was who he was Max had started get even worse. Years later they'll probably laugh about the moment and how everything finally started to fall into place. Finally.

* * *

_AN: It's short I know, but I can't get past this spot, so I was hoping anyone who has any ideas would send them my way so I could try and finish this story up! What I use, that isn't mine, will be properly accredited to the original thinker! Please help! _

* * *


	33. Abyss

_Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons._

* * *

With Ben In Between

* * *

"Hey Boo, I forgot lotion! You go on up, I'm gonna run back to the store," O.C. Sighed when looking in her bag of goodies for the perfect girls night.

"I'll just go with you," Max offered getting ready to step down from the two stairs she had already ascended.

"Nuh-uh, you gonna go straight up into your boy's place and put your feet up. And that is an order!" Cindy shook her finger at Max and blocked her way to move, "you need to rest for baby boo, now go on up, now!" Sighing, Max reluctantly turned around and continued climbing the last three stairs to Alec's apartment.

When she walked in, Alec was no where to be seen but empty, dirty boxes were strewn all over the apartment. It was a max of cardboard, bubble wrap and strips of pulled tape as Max weaved around the objects, following the trail. The trail lead to Alec's second bed room turned office. When almost to the door, Max heard Alec grunt and then a thud. Curious, she peered around the door jam to be greeted with something very unexpected.

* * *

The girls had been gone most of the day, much to his relief. Not that he didn't love them both, he did, but he needed air from all the estrogen. Not really, again he loved them both, but he wanted to finish his project before Max's baby was born. After his very civil chat with Logan, he had planned on what to do to help Max in every way that he could get away with. That alone is a hard task, hand him an angry mob any day, they'd be easier then trying to figure out what Max would let him get away with helping her. Sure she was letting Logan help out, but they had a quid-pro-quo. He help her and the baby she'd pay him back while also helping him out with journalistic future...which seemed pretty non-existent for the multi-millionaire heir. But Logan and Max also didn't have a history, not one like his and Max's. That made things even more difficult. Sighing he tossed another empty box out into the living room, with the thousand others he had already opened and empty.

"Almost done," he said proudly to himself as he stared at his accomplishment so far. He originally was going to use his room, but he didn't have enough time to move everything out of his room and all this stuff in there, get set up and cleaned up, while also doing his room. Plus Max prolly would've knocked his head to hard he'd be seeing double for a week. Even in pregnancy her right hook was harmful, and dangerous to his health. Putting away the last bit of stuff in the bottom drawer, Alec looked at his last obstacle to finishing this project. Multiple pieces with little nook and cranny pieces, his worst enemy. Would it be too late to take that angry mob? Heaving a great sigh, he set to work in trying to understand the directions of multiple foreign languages. He seriously should've paid more attention in International Language class, he always ended up falling asleep in the class and copying Ben's notes and homework. Smiling at the thought of his brother, Alec couldn't help but wonder what his brother would think if he saw him; Mr. Tough Guy gone softie and setting up this room. He'd either laugh his ass off into the next millennium or take pity and help up figure this mess out. After all it was for Max.

45 minutes later, it was done! Success! Unable to deny the urge, Alec found himself doing a little victory dance that he would never acknowledge ever happened. When his dance was done he crouched down and lifted the large piece, groaning he finally right sided it and it landed on the floor with a resounding, successful thud.

"What are you doing?" Max's voice came from the door way. Swinging around, Alec felt like a deer caught in headlights. Shit, she got back earlier than he had hoped she would. 20 more minutes would've been great, 'Thanks blue lady,' he thought sarcastically looking at the very stunned and confused pregnant woman. 'Jesus she's gorgeous.' Followed by the thought of, 'I'm going to hell.'

"Uh...you got home a little earlier than I had planned...obviously." He said very lamely. Reaching and scratching the back of his head, a nervous gesture Max recognized, "I was gonna surprise you...when I was done." Looking away from Alec, Max looked at the room and gasped, truly seeing what was in there. It was her stuff...her stuff that she had left in America at hers and Cindy's apartment, as well as all the things at Logan's apartment. All her furniture, toys and extra blankets. All neatly placed in the former office. Gone was the plain white walls, painted a beautiful mint green that reminder her of ice-cream. With that thought, she became hungry but ignored the urge to further see everything. A plush carpet that was emerald green, stretched over the hard wood floors. Low light lamp were hung periodically on the walls with frosted globes covering the bulbs. In the fare left corner sat her changing table, fitted perfectly into the corner with its attached shelf holding all her supplies. To right, in the corner was a rocking chair, that wasn't hers, with a soft cushion on the seat and a matching blanket hanging over the back. Next to the rocking chair was a small table with a little lamp. Along the wall was her crib, set up with all the dressing and cushions placed perfectly inviting in it. A mobile, that wasn't hers, hung from one side. Little bears dressed in long john pajamas that were different colors hung at different heights over the crib. Next to the crib was the dresser Cindy had bought for her. They had painted it themselves with little animals dancing all over the surface. Sitting on top was some of the stuffed animals she and Cindy both had bought. The opposite of the crib, on the left wall was what Alec had been working on. A twin bed frame, a mattress leaning up against the wall by the door, where the closet was.

"Alec..." she didn't know what to say. He seemed nervous. Feeling her hormones kick in, tears slipped down her cheeks and bottom lip trembled. "You didn't have to do this," she mumbled over her blubbering self.

"I know, but I wanted to. I had Logan send all your things so you'd have everything for when you had the baby." He said softly looking at her. Not knowing what else to say, Max just walked into the room and hugged him, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist and burying her face in his chest. His arms immediately wrapped themselves around her frame and enveloped her in warmth.

Cindy found them that way 5 minutes later, speechless when seeing what Alec had done to the room and what he had done in general. When the two pulled apart, Max dried up and Alec left to get food for dinner, Cindy sat Max down and got ready for their girls night. Alec, earlier that morning, had informed them that he was going to go to the base to do some paper work, so they could have their night. So once the food was served and everything was set, Alec left the girls to their pampering.

* * *

Cindy was just finishing Max's toe nails when her cell phone rang. Answering it she immediately smiled, it was a girl she had ran into days earlier. Definitely liking her, Cindy had exchanged numbers to meet up sometime. Apparently the girl wanted to meet up, "I wish I could, but I'm here with my girl-" The phone was removed from her hands by Max.

"Hi, Lindsey? Yeah, hi Cindy will meet you at the pub in one hour. Bye!" Max clicked the phone off and smiled at her best friend who stared at her like she had grown two new heads. "You are going, I will be fine here. I got plenty of food and entertainment to last a lifetime. If anything is wrong, Alec is on speed dial. Now go get ready, she's waiting." Cindy protested for a good 10 minutes before Max threw a pillow at her and demanded she leave before her hormones kicked in. As her best friend walked into Alec's bed room to get ready, Max heard her mutter something along the lines of 'crazy pregnant white girls.' She laughed and took a bit of the ice cream Alec had bought her earlier.

45 minutes later Cindy was sashaying her way out of the apartment, looking like a million dollars and nothing less. Max just snuggled further into the comfy couch and started watching whatever movie was on, which happened to be 'Knocked Up' half way through the movie Max started to feel her happy state slip away into an abyss of worry and fear. She turned the movie off and looked around the empty apartment, it wasn't her apartment. Standing up from the couch Max walked to the bed room Alec has fixed up for her and baby...their baby. Even though he didn't know it was his baby. Thinking that, a lump formed in her throat and nerves began to tingle.

This wasn't her apartment, this room wasn't hers. It was Alec's, everything was Alec's, except her. She wasn't Alec's girlfriend anymore, she wasn't his best friend...was she even a friend? "Charity case," her lips began to tremble at the reality of that. He was a good guy who would do anything for anyone. He'd give out every last shirt he owned, even the last one he's wearing, if he thought it'd help someone.

He was just helping her, he didn't love her. Tears welled in her eyes and she held on tightly to the door jam. She had messed up so much, messed up so much for Ben, for Alec, she was a horrible person. "Oh god, I'm going to be a horrible mother! My baby is going to hate me!" She cried hugging herself to the door jam while starring at the beautiful baby room. "Alec will hate me!" He probably already did, but she was a charity case. Pushing away from the room she walked into bed room, Alec's where she and Cindy had been sleeping. Curling up on the bed she wrapped the covers around her and started to let out loud and uncontrollable. She was all alone, she and her baby were all alone. She had messed everything up and now there was nothing good for her.

* * *

"Heading home early?" Syl asked as she walked along side Alec to the main building on base.

"Yeah, two friends on mine are staying with me and one's home alone." Alec said easily. Syl had been the first fellow solider he had met when moving to the European base. She was easy on the eyes and easy to be around. They instantly bonded over the fact of being Manticore Military Prodigies. Her dad being the one and only Col. Lydecker. Luckily she looked nothing like him.

"Oh yeah, how's your friend doing? Everything turn out ok?" She was referring to the incident when Max had showed up distraught.

"Yeah, it all worked in the end. I took care of it," he said with a tone that ended that area of the conversation.

"That's good. She's lucky she has someone there for her, pregnancy is a bitch to get through with people there for you. Alone, can't imagine it," Syl smiled thinking of her own son. "Well here's my stop, catch you later McDowell!"

* * *

When Alec opened his apartment door two things became apparent. First, Max's bowl of ice cream laid melted and spilled on the living room floor. The second, painfully sobs were emitting from his bedroom. Walking towards the room, "Max? You ok?" He called out as he walked in. instead of finding her he found a bundle of blankets that periodically shuddered with each sob. "Max?" Trying to find an opening to the blankets, Alec began to get worried. What was wrong? When he found Max, her face was red and blotchy with tears smeared all over.

"I can't even cry into my knees! I'm so fat!" Was the firs thing she wailed when she covered her face with her hands, in attempt to hid from his sight.

"What's wrong Max? Come'on, talk to me?" He prodded gently, pulling her hands away from her face and holding them in his own.

"I'm all alone! I'm a horrible person that messes everything and everyone's life up! My baby is going to hate me and I'm a big fat charity case that has no where to go!" She wailed trying to cover her face again, but Alec held her hands restrained.

"Max," she continued to struggle against him. "Max!" He tried a little louder.

"Ben would've ended up hating me if he hadn't died! Logan hates me, well I hate him! I ruined everything! You'll end up hating me in the end! Hell so will Cindy! Everyone hates the stupid fat girl who can't do anything right! My own baby will hate me-" She ranted trying to get free from Alec. Soon she stopped struggling against him and started to hit him with their fists. Pounding his chest in fear and sadness.

"Max," he wrapped his arms tightly around her, trapping her pounding fists and her sobs to his chest. "That's not true, none of it is true. Ben loved you more than anything, and nothing could have changed that. I could never hate you either, and Cindy would just beat you to the bloody pulp for even suggesting her ever having an ill thought against you." He whispered in her ear as he rocked her slightly.

Seconds. Minutes. Hours. Who knows, but after time Max began to calm down and see through the hormone fog. The firs thing that she noticed was Alec smelled good, really good. He had that certain smell about him that always made me just smile, on the rare occasion he wore cologne, it was this soft, but very manly, smell that made her knees knock together. Right now he had some cologne on with his own unique smell, she smiled. The next thing she noticed was he was warm and safe, two things he had always been to her. Even way back in the beginning when she didn't even know why she was with him for any other fact than he was Ben's twin. "Alec?" She whispered, by the slight movement of his body, Max knew that she heard him. She needed to tell him something, something that she had been wanting to for so long.

"You feeling better?" He asked softly as they pulled apart to be able to see each other's face. He wiped a stray tear away from her cheek, lightly cupping it. Much like he use to do when they were just in their own world together.

"Yeah," she whispered. Her vocal ability seemed to be limited due to her long period of crying and harsh sobs. "I need to say something."

"Sure that's a good idea?" He joked raising an brow at her voice. She smiled closed her eyes, "what is it?"

"That day- that day that I told you about Ben and I-"

"Max-"

"No listen. That day was the day I let go of Ben for good. I didn't want him or his brother." A pained look passed over Alec's face, "I just wanted you. That cocky guy who danced with me on the terrace and did cheesy things for me. That's who I wanted, I didn't want Ben. In truth I don't think I really wanted him even before then, but I was too stubborn to see what was in front of me." Alec didn't more or say anything, "I fell in love with you, and...and I still do love you. I don't expect you to say it back, not anymore, but I just want you to know that part at least."

"Max," he was still whispering, and it was distracting now that her mind was clear. It was down right sexy as hell! "I never stopped loving you." Before she said anything he lightly kissed her on the cheek, right by the corner of her lips. Then kissed on the mouth. It wasn't passionate or hungry, it was simple and full of love.

When they pulled apart for the second time that night, Max and Alec just stared at each other. "Where do we go from here?" Max asked when she regained control over herself, somewhat.

"I want you to stay here, with me in Europe or where ever I move. I want to be with you."

"What about the baby?" Max remembered he still thought that it was someone elses.

"I wanna raise the baby with you." Her heart swelled.

"Alec, before we go into anything there are a lot of things we need to talk about a lot of things. Baby included." Something passed over Alec's face when she said this.

"Of, course. The father." Something in his voice.

"He doesn't know...that the baby is his." Alec swallowed hard and nodded slowly.

"Ok." He said in attempt to be confident, "lets take things slow and see how everything works out." He smiled one of those smiles that promised all the riches of the world, and Max smiled in return. "Can I kiss you again?"

"Please do!" She answered enthusiastically. He kissed her with the same vigor. It was several pecks, before Max giggled and ended the little session. "I missed this, you and me." Alec nodded and leaned down to kiss her hands and then her stomach tenderly.

* * *

_A.N.- I know this really late and long over due. Sorry! Couldn't write anything until now, so I hope its good! Please review with your opinion(s) and future ideas! Greatly appreciated and if I use anything that is not mine it will be credited accordingly._

_

* * *

  
_


End file.
